What's My Name Again?
by 120shadowlev27
Summary: When 16 year old Kanda is injured gathering Innocence, an eye-patched, red-head going by Remy helps him out. When the teenager reappears with a different name, Kanda just can't get a grip on him. Kanda/Lavi.
1. Remy

So, I read somewhere that Lavi was good at medical aid. Dunno if that's canon or not, but hey, I don't really care.

Also, Louis Pasteur is my hero of the week.

* * *

><p>He hurt all over and his tattoo wasn't helping fast enough. He could tell that Marie and Daisya were also injured. Pulling himself from a heap of rubble and looking around, Kanda realized that the Level 2 was distracted by the snake carrying the Innocence. The snake was defending itself valiantly and was immune to most of the Level 2 attacks.<p>

They had received the mission a week prior. A small town was being terrorized by a legendary serpent, a basilisk. It would come out at night and feed on livestock. Finders investigating confirmed the fact and it was reasonable to believe that Innocence was a major cause. A sixteen year old Kanda, as well as Marie and Daisya, were dispatched due to the presence of two Level 2 demons as well as multiple other lower levels. When they had arrived at the town, they found it loaded with military. The country had just lost in a war with its neighbor and was now under watch. A day before they arrived, a treaty was signed in that very town.

Not really caring about the state of petty wars, the exorcists had done their jobs and managed to locate the basilisk when it came to town to hunt. Unfortunately, the demons made their move, leading to a battle that had the three exorcists fighting both to kill demons and to prevent the serpent from escaping.

The blast of one Level 2s destruction had leveled an abandoned building onto Kanda and his comrades. He was suffering from several broken ribs and what he felt must be internal damage, as well as the fact that his left arm was dangling at a funny angle with his shoulder a mangled, bloody ruin of flesh. Blood dripped from the numerous cuts on his body, leaking to the rubble. His tattoo was taking too long to heal. Gritting his teeth against the pain, Kanda summoned his First Illusion and slew the demon. He turned to the basilisk.

The serpent regarded him with eerie intelligence. Golden eyes reflected him. A tongue darted out to taste him. Its mouth cracked open and it hissed, fangs flashing. Having watched it destroy the rest of the Level 1, Kanda knew how blazing fast it was. Those fangs could cripple him for a while, allowing it to escape and more demons to accumulate. He wanted to just get this over with. He watched for weaknesses, as it watched him for the same.

A noise behind it caused both to look over for a split second. It attacked the person behind it, a boy with red hair. The boy yelped and dove out of the way. In that second, Kanda attacked, driving Mugen through its gut. In its last instant of life, the serpent turned and burrowed its teeth in his arm, nearly ripping it off. While blood trickled warmly down his arm, Kanda pulled the green orb from the beast's corpse and stashed it before he felt his body lose energy from blood loss.

The boy that had originally provided the distraction hurried over. Kanda blinked. It was the kid he had seen loitering around town reading. The one with the eye patch and red hair. He was without his customary oversized poncho though, wearing only a black, filthy shirt with fingerless gloves.

"You're going to die from the severity of those injuries," the boy murmured without much feeling, kneeling next to Kanda and prodding at the mess that was his arm, "There's no way that you can get help before you bleed to death." The kid's eye was a dull green, as if bored with the entire process of death. "Che," Kanda hissed, wiping a stream of blood from his mouth, "I've had worse. Now, if you want to actually do something useful instead of standing around looking stupid, go over to that rubble and see if my comrades are ok."

The boy listened, surprisingly. He picked his way through the rubble as Kanda watched, feeling his tattoo begin to work on his internal organs. They must have been more dangerous than the mangled arm. The kid stopped and crouched pushing at a rock until it budged, then lending a hand to help up Marie, who limped twice before walking normally. After another minute of picking through the rubble, the boy leaned down again to kick away some rubble and pull at the unconscious form of Daisya. Marie easily lifted him up and draped him over his shoulder. The boy said something to Marie and started back to Kanda.

He coughed up some blood and sucked in a gurgling breath. One of his ribs probably punctured a lung. He could feel the tattoo pushing the rib out of his lung and merge the bone back together with a steady crackling feel.

"I can't believe you're still alive," the boy murmured as he knelt down in front of Kanda.

"Don't question it, it's just a peculiarity of his," Marie explained, leaning down to feel for Kanda. Although he hated the indignity of being carried, Kanda knew he couldn't walk in his state. He shifted into Marie's other arm and winced as he was lifted.

"Follow me," the boy murmured and headed through the rubble towards a tent.

"Shouldn't we go to a hospital?" Marie asked.

"Nah, I know more about health than these folks, and they have their hands full with injured soldiers. They'd be more likely to turn you out," the boy said with a smirk riddled with cynicism.

The tent was loaded with books. As Marie ducked under the flap, the boy quickly spread out two clean, albeit stained bed mats. Marie placed Kanda on one and Daisya on the other, settling between a couple stacks of books. Kanda wrinkled his nose at the smell of alcohol rising from the mat.

"Who dropped vodka on these?" Kanda grumbled. The boy looked up from a tool box with a red cross on it. He had tied his red, messy hair up with a black head band. Little loop earrings hung from his lobes. Without his poncho, the kid was thin as a rod. Kanda could guess that the kid was slightly younger than him and hadn't finished growing. He was a good half foot shorter than Kanda.

"Its ethyl alcohol," he murmured, "It's to prevent infections." He set a rusty pan and a clean towel next to Kanda. Rolls of gauze, tape, and various instruments piled on the towel. The red head placed a large bottle of clear fluid next to the pan. Then, he knelt next to Kanda, rubbing alcohol on his relatively clean hands.

"Is that some old wives' tale?" Kanda asked as the boy began to peel his ragged coat off. The fabric was torn and frayed and the threads were sticking in clotting blood to the torn flesh of Kanda's shoulder. Pulling it off hurt.

For the first time, the boy's eye caught a spark of interest. A smirk broke out from the kid's face.

"It's science actually," he explained, sprinkling some water on the scabs to loosen them, "A French chemist conducted a bunch of experiments proving how micro organisms are actually the cause of all illness. By eliminating these micro organisms, doctors can prevent illnesses and infections." With that, he took a grip of a particularly stubborn section of the coat and ripped it off. Kanda bit through his bottom lip. The rest of the coat and shirt underneath pealed off rather easily. He lay down at the boy's urging.

"The experiments and implications are fascinating," he murmured excitedly, "Ya know, the same organisms that kill people are also responsible for making things like milk spoil. These organisms can be killed either with alcohol or heat, so if you cook milk it'll last longer."

"You're off your head, aren't you?" Kanda grumbled. The boy pouted as he felt Kanda's stomach for internal injuries.

"You're mending inside, incredulously," the boy murmured, "I think that the best I can do is wrap your arm to prevent any more blood loss, despite the fact that you seem to be producing it as fast as you lose it."

"What's your name, kid?" Kanda asked as the boy poured alcohol into the rusty pan to wipe off Kanda's shoulder. The kid paused for a second, as if not sure.

"Remy," he murmured finally and grabbed Kanda's shoulder, jerking it back into place. Kanda nearly broke his teeth.

"You a gypsy or something?" Kanda asked, wondering why he was asking so much. He normally didn't give a shit about anyone, but this Remy kid was intriguing him. Maybe it was the cynicism.

"Heh," Remy laughed as he wound gauze around the black haired teen's shoulder, "Close enough. I'm an apprentice for the Bookmen. But my master is getting a new mission right now." He moved on to swabbing and wrapping the bite marks. By that time, Daisya was waking up.

"Ugh, big fucking snake," the kid muttered under his breath. Kanda narrowed his eyes, no longer concerned.

Kanda healed as much as necessary in two hours, enabling him to walk. He turned to Remy and nodded his thanks. The group headed off to Headquarters, leaving the apprentice to his tent.

An elder man emerged an hour later. His eyes were painted black and a cigarette hung off of his lip.

"We have a new mission in the Urals. Your new alias is Deke," the old man murmured, "Don't slip up."

* * *

><p>I dunno if I'm continuing this. It all depends on how long I have the hair up my ass to write for DGM. If you have any suggestions for if I continue, let me know, cuz I dunno right now if I'm going to make this shonen-ai or more of a Kirk-Spock t'hy'la relationship.<p> 


	2. Lavi

So, I've decided this shall continue. And will be at least 7 chapters long. Also, this will probably turn out to be romance. And will contain lengthy scientific explanations because I enjoy it sooooo much. And maybe philosophy. Because I find readers and writers to be more intelligent than most of the students and some of the professors at my college. And because I enjoy it.

Mostly because I enjoy it.

* * *

><p><strong>Lavi<strong>

He knew what that keening sound was. It was heartbreak and loss. It was tragedy. It was anger. It was hopelessness. It was determination. It was the sound that signaled that Lenalee would be following him around later. It was the sound that foretold the stench of burnt flesh and raining ashes for the next day.

Kanda sighed and stretched as he headed up from the training ground. New skin covering his ribs tingled slightly. He needed to stop by Komui and ask about the status of new missions and about the outcome of the battle in Prague. From the sound emanating out of the corridor, Kanda could guess the answer. Still, he pushed open the door of the supervisor's office and found it empty.

"Hmm," Kanda was curious. Reever wasn't likely to let Komui out especially after such a large battle. He wondered if there were new exorcists. Having a said hunch, he wandered down to the science division and noted that the elevator was descended.

A yelp sounded from below, then a bright flash, followed by a moan. Kanda raised his eyebrow. People often screamed when Hevlaska felt them up, but it didn't usually help. After another ten to fifteen minutes, the elevator rose back up, bearing Komui, an elderly midget, and an unconscious teenage boy sprawling across the floor.

His eyes widened. Red hair and an eye patch made the boy very distinctive. An image from a few months ago of a cynical smirk and a practiced medic came to mind. He almost shat. The name clicked into place, Re-

"This is Bookman and his apprentice, Lavi, Kanda-kun," Komui yelled when he noticed the samurai, "They're from the Bookmen clan and are new exorcists. Can you show them around for me?"

"Che," Kanda growled, suddenly in a much darker mood. What the fuck was going on, "I came to ask for missions, not to play tour guide." The supervisor approached Kanda and laid a hand on his shoulder. Kanda felt himself soften when he noticed how worn down Komui looked.

"I would normally ask Lenalee, but she's in the infirmary," well, that explained the lack of a shadow following him around, "and I would do it myself, but I need to commence with the cremation before any of the friends resurrect demons. The battle went badly. We haven't any reports of Innocence, so you'll be free for at least a day. Please Kanda," the man urged, completely seriously. Kanda couldn't find it to shut down that look.

"Fine," Kanda said gruffly, then haltingly patted Komui's arm in what he guessed was a comforting gesture before getting embarrassed and striding purposefully over to their new guests. He looked over the short old man. His clothes were filthy and layered on top of each other like a homeless person and he smelled like cigarette smoke. The old man looked back at him with a similar look of disdain.

"Who the hell are you?" Kanda asked roughly.

"BE POLITE!" Komui scolded, causing the black haired teen to flinch. The old man didn't blink.

"I have no name. I only go by Bookman," the man rasped. Kanda looked down at the kid.

"What happened to him?" he asked shortly. Bookman looked down at his apprentice with a stern eye.

"When we received our Innocence, he passed out from the shock," the man said, "Also, low blood sugar. He neglected to inform me that our rations were running low again and he had been giving me his share for the past few days. Idiot."

"Another martyr then," Kanda scoffed, "He'll be dead within a month,"

The old man raised an eyebrow and shook his head. He glanced down at his apprentice, who was starting to twitch and awaken.

"We are not here to sacrifice our lives," the old man said, "We are here to record history. We only offer our bodies to this side, not our lives."

"Hmph, then why did Innocence choose you?" Kanda asked.

"Oh look," Bookman diverted, "He's starting to wake up."

Kanda huffed and knelt down over the boy. The resemblance to the boy he had seen the year previous was uncanny. Messy, red hair tied back in a black headband; oversized, filthy poncho; eye patch; green shirt. The only difference seemed to be that the kid was at least ten pounds lighter and he'd been skinny before. One wouldn't notice how skinny Lavi was, as his clothes layered over each other to hide it. Still, with a face that gaunt, he wouldn't have been able to hide it for long. This wasn't the product of a few days without food.

The boy groaned as if in pain and lurched over to his side, clutching his stomach. Kanda backed up a little in disgust; he didn't want to get puked on. He needn't have worried, as the boy just opened his eyes and blinked a few times.

"Whoa, I feel gross," the boy said as he loosened his grip on his stomach and pushed himself upright on shaky hands.

WHACK! The old man whacked his apprentice hard on the head.

"OW! What the hell was that for, old man?" Lavi yelped, clutching his newly formed lump. Kanda watched with interest.

"Idiot! That was for being a martyr! It's called get more food!" The old man scolded. The boy narrowed his eye.

"Well, it's hard to get food when you don't have any money, old fart!" the boy argued back vehemently. Kanda was starting to get bored. It had been fun at first, but this was starting to get old.

"Can we go now?" Kanda grumbled. Lavi looked over. There was a reaction, albeit sudden, the smallest widening of the visible eye, before the eyelid draped over it and he smiled suavely, arms crossed loosely. No emotion could be detected in that eye.

"Hey, who are you?" the apprentice asked. Kanda narrowed his eyes.

"Kanda," he said shortly and turned to walk ahead of them. He heard the two fall into step and glanced back. The redhead had seemingly subconsciously switched sides with Bookman so that his blind eye was guarded by the older man and free eye was to the side. Kanda wondered what happened to the eye.

Which was strange, seeing as how he didn't give a shit about anyone except Marie. Well, maybe he gave a shit about Lenalee.

He heard a small murmuring behind him and tuned his ears to listen in. However, his eavesdropping was not paid off, as they were speaking in some strange language. It wasn't anything he recognized, and he'd been to many countries.

With a huff, he led them through the castle, gave them brief explanations of the various places. He wasn't Lenalee and wouldn't be a tour guide. The castle was boring.

There were some reactions he found entertaining, for some reason. The bath house, with the communal bath lined with moss covered rocks and a waterfall, seemed to illicit an excited gasp from Lavi. The training room elicited a creepy, plotting cackle from the boy behind him. The library, however, had the most interesting reaction.

Komui's study housed his favorite books and was impressive in itself, but the library housed a collection that far surpassed some of the best libraries in Europe. Tiedoll had waxed eloquently for hours about it.

"Wow," Lavi murmured. He ran over to the first shelf and began to run his fingers over the spines of all the books. Kanda raised an eyebrow at the reverent way Lavi was taking in the book. Weirdo.

"Idiot Lavi," Bookman said warningly. Lavi looked over and blinked, slowly sticking his hands in his pockets and slouching back over.

Kanda continued his path. The two were quiet for a while until a loud noise made its way from Lavi's stomach to permeate the entire corridor. Kanda and Bookman turned to stare at the sheepish looking teenager.

"Ugh, sorry," he said. Kanda sighed and kept walking.

"Cafeteria is the next stop," Kanda grumbled. Why the hell did he have to do this shit? Yeah, Komui said that an exorcist had to conduct the tour, but that was only because Lenalee insisted on being a tour guide. The brat didn't know that when she was out of commission, the job would fall on some other unsuspecting fuck.

"So, is Kanda your first name or your last name?" Lavi asked. Kanda stiffened. This was what he meant.

"Last name," Kanda growled, "And that is the only name you can call me."

Thankfully, they were entering the cafeteria. Kanda knew every eye was upon the unusual group, but gave no indication. It wasn't every day that you had two homeless looking men wearing capes wandering through the Order. He headed up to Jerri, who was flashing all around his kitchen. Kanda could admire Jerri.

"Soba?" Jerri asked, already reaching for the materials. Kanda nodded. However, Jerri noticed the two new people. More specifically, he noticed Lavi.

"Oooooh, and just who might you be?" Jerri cooed, leaning over to get a good look at Lavi. Kanda sweat dropped. Lavi's eyes widened and he smiled sheepishly as the cook looked him up and down. The red head looked over to Kanda for help, but Kanda just waited boredly. He wanted his soba.

"When the heck was the last time you ate?" Jerri asked, his smile gone, his eyes suspicious, as he plucked at the oversized woolen poncho and poked at the ribs underneath with the end of a wooden spoon.

"Uwah!" Lavi yelped and jumped away, clutching his side. Jerri smirked.

"What's yo name?" Jerri asked, leaning on the counter. Lavi smirked out the side of his mouth and rubbed the back of his head.

"I'm Lavi," he said. Jerri looked down at Bookman.

"I am Bookman," the man said. Jerri looked back over at Lavi, intrigued.

"What you wanna eat? I can make anything you want," Jerri said. Lavi blinked and looked down to exchange a glance with Bookman.

"Like what?" Lavi asked. Jerri narrowed his eyes and jutted his lip out.

"Like...soba, sushi, sashimi, miso, tempura shrimp, tempura vegetables, udon, pad Thai, my famous Noodle soup, egg foo young, Szechuan anything, pot stickers, sticky rice, fried rice, egg over rice, jasmine rice, po cha, stir fry, chaana masala, palak paneer, chicken tikka masala, chole saag, chutney, polska kielbasa, potato pancakes, bratwurst, Weisswurst, schnitzel, barszcz, raclette, spaetzle, caprese, spaghetti, antipasto salad, pizza, carbonara, ziti, ravioli, risotto, steak au poivre, coq au vin, quiche, boef bourguignon, bouillabaise, ratatouille, cuchifritos, escabeche, fideua, paella, gomen, altkilt wot, fasolia, doro wot, dullet, and let's not forget the meats for the growing boy: beef, chicken, pork, lamb, sheep, goose, duck, venison, hare, trout, bass, pike, salmon, tuna, sardines, sprats, eel..."

"Ok, ok, they get it," Kanda cut Jerri off, "Now can I have my soba?"

The cook looked vaguely put off and turned from the two dazed looking to get Kanda's soba started. Lavi turned to Kanda with big eyes.

"How is that even possible?" he asked. Kanda narrowed his eyes.

"Ask him some other time," Kanda growled and folded his arms.

"Hmmm," Lavi pondered, then drooled with a sappy smile on his face. Jerri returned to the window, smiling expectantly.

"Well?" he asked. Lavi smiled broadly.

"Steak au poivre and caprese salad, please" Lavi drooled. Jerri looked over to Bookman.

"Barszcz and chocolate pudding," Bookman said. Jerri and Lavi deadpanned. Kanda rolled his eyes and tapped his fingers. Jerri turned from the window and began to cook. Lavi blinked as a weird container filled with noodles came up. Kanda picked it up and left to an empty table. Maybe he could shake the two and they could latch onto someone else.

No such luck apparently, as the two found him with plates in hand and sat opposite of him. Kanda could feel the looks surrounding him. Great, now people would see him sitting with others and assume that he was available for socialization. Hell no. He didn't need a fucking group chattering him when he was trying to enjoy a quiet lunch. Especially after listening to the people wailing that afternoon. So he tried to look even more intimidating to the people across from him. Lavi didn't notice, too caught up in his food, and Bookman didn't seem to give a shit.

"What caused so many casualties?" Bookman asked. Kanda chewed and swallowed. Great, more pointless conversation.

"Didn't Komui tell you? There was a giant battle in Prague. A storm of demons were after one of the minor branches, where several pieces of Innocence were located, waiting for a General to pick them up and distribute them. Many of the finders were killed and an exorcist died, so they were brought to Central for cremation," Kanda explained boredly.

"Why do they cremate the dead?" Bookman asked. Kanda blinked and narrowed his eyes.

"You do know how demons are created?" Kanda asked. The two nodded. Kanda sighed, "If they send them back to their families, then more demons will be created. To avoid that, none of the families can know that their loved ones have died."

"How do people become Finders?" God, what was with all these fucking questions?

"They usually need money fast, or they think that they are serving God," Kanda said with a sneer.

Lavi, who had cleared his plate in record time, leaned over the table, staring at Kanda's chest.

"What?" Kanda asked suddenly self conscious, but not showing any indication of it. Lavi narrowed his eyes.

"You've got something," Lavi said, reaching his hand, covered in a filthy green fingerless glove, to point at something on Kanda's chest, causing him to look down, "Right THERE!" and he grinned widely and flicked Kanda's nose.

Kanda had a conniption. The skin peeled back from his skull and flames shot out of his eyes and nose. His hand reached for Mugen and he quickly drew it from the sheath.

"IDIOT!" Kanda roared, slashing his sword through the air at Lavi. However, the boy was a lot faster than he had anticipated. He ducked under the sword, then bounced over it and rolled away from the table. He looked scared.

"Jesus, I was just joking around," Lavi squeaked, backing up, murmuring, "So scary," under his breath.

"Don't fucking touch me," Kanda hissed, "Don't come near me. Don't fucking look at me, or I'll cut your idiot body into little pieces." He huffed and noticed that he was getting stares. He glared at all the starers.

Bookman ignored the entire interchange, finished his beet soup quietly, and interjected, "I'm assuming there were wounded?" Kanda, not to be distracted, nodded. Bookman stood up and picked up his empty tray.

"Lavi, let's go help with the wounded," Bookman said and stood up, heading towards the infirmary. Lavi followed, watching his back the entire time. Kanda kept Mugen out until they were out of sight. Just in case. Who was this fucking idiot?

* * *

><p>Actually wrote chapter 4 before chapter 3...and am still writing it. Also kind of using this space as an internal monologue which is why I'm not using full sentences. See. Dependent clauses without independent clauses. No subject verb agreement. And improper comma use. Weird, my monologue generally speaks in memes. And one does not simply record one's monologue on the internet where everyone can see. But we gotta badass over here. You know what I learned in my bio lecture? Butterflies taste with their feet. We use flower genitalia as gifts of romantic love. In that sense, shouldn't presenting someone a bouquet of human genitalia be an even better gesture? But instead, that's just plain creepy. Also, if you had a wall of carpet and threw a cat on it, it would stick. Unless you declawed it. Or if you declawed just the front paws. Its back paws would stick and front paws wouldn't. It would flip over backwards.<p>

Anyway, I shall update soon.


	3. Idiot

So, this story has been my latest obsession. Yay! I actually wrote the chapter 4 before this one. However, chapter 4 has a slightly ooc Kanda. I blame it on hormones. Just like his grumpiness in this one.

* * *

><p>"What the fuck happened to you?" Kanda asked Reever, who was covered in flour and looking quite upset as he tried to wash the flour off his hands in the sink. He wasn't having too much success, as the flour was getting moist and clumping.<p>

"Gonna give that galah a gobful if I catch 'im," Reever grumbled, scrubbing his arms up to the elbow with soap as Kanda watched. He was getting his sleeves wet. He was obviously pissed, as his usually proper English was tarnished with slurs and slang.

"Komui?" Kanda asked. Reever dried his arms off furiously with a towel, scrubbing the little stuck pieces of flour.

"Not this time," Reever growled, "I sprung that red headed whacka fix'n with one of Komui's thingo's. I'm fuckin' spewin'"

Kanda blinked.

"_What?_" he asked utterly confused. Reever sighed and leaned over the bathroom sink, shaking his hair. It didn't move with the amount of gel in it, keeping it plastered away from the scientist's face.

"Sorry," Reever murmured, "Lavi was messing with one of Komui's inventions and I when I caught him, he turned it on me and coated me with flour. I swear, Matron has to tie him to his bed between missions or we're all gonna go insane."

Kanda rolled his eyes. The only time he ever saw the other exorcist was when the he was in the hallway surrounded by people. He honestly couldn't give a shit about people like that.

He left Reever to shake like a flea bitten dog and went to track down Komui. There had to be something that he could do instead of sitting around training and listening to whiny Australians. As he entered the study, he once again had no clue what was going on.

It was crowded. Komui, Bookman, Lavi, Marie, and Tiedoll were all occupying the room. However, Komui was passed out on the desk with a red head leaning over him, drawing on his face, bouncing on his heels in giddy excitement. Bookman was reading a report on the couch, ignoring the way his apprentice was acting as if it was completely normal. Marie and Tiedoll were conferring quietly.

"What the fuck is going on?" Kanda asked quietly, again, but nobody heard him. Lenalee pushed past him into the room with a frown on her face. She walked up to Lavi and shoved him over. He fell away easily, giggling sheepishly.

"Hey Lenalee," Lavi said sweetly, clasping his hands behind his head and leaning against the arm of the couch, "Have you ever tried jumping into the stars?"

"No, why?" Lenalee asked, placing a cup of coffee on the desk and starting to whack Komui in the head. Kanda could hear Tiedoll telling Marie about the hearts drawn around the Supervisor's eyes and the obnoxiously drawn tear streaks. Marie was giggling. There was too much going on.

"Because you are looking out of this world," Lavi finished, winking or blinking, it was hard to tell. Kanda felt himself getting steamed at Lavi for using that on Lenalee, but it had the effect of making her blush and roll her eyes and make Komui wake up.

"Lavi!" Komui yelled, bolting awake with indignation, "That's my baby sister! That is unacceptable, you sex fiend, how dare you come onto your comrade! This will not be tolerated!"

"Quiet brother," Lenalee huffed. Komui sucked in a deep breath, probably in order to continue his rant about how terrible Lavi was, when he noticed the company in the room and lost his train of thought.

"Oh, I have business to attend to," Komui said, turning first to Tiedoll, "It's nice to see you, General, how may I help you?"

"Just here to debrief on the situation and to see my kids," Tiedoll said with a calm countenance. Kanda tensed in irritation, but remained silent.

"Oh," Komui said with a nod, then noted Bookman, "Do you have anything in particular?"

"Just more questions," Bookman said quietly, "They can wait." Komui nodded then glanced at Kanda and smiled. He knew what Kanda wanted.

"Ok, Tiedoll, I'll get you first," Komui said and pulled out a notebook.

"The demons have been lying low after the assault on Prague," Tiedoll said softly, "There have been no new Innocence users from any of the other communicating Generals. However, there is a rumor in the dark parts of the world about an elegant man with red hair and a golden golem racking up debt and signing it to his proxy, a white haired boy with a deformed arm. That libertine behavior sounds a lot look Cross."

"So, Marian is traveling with what could be an apprentice," Komui said quietly, "How old are these rumors?"

"Just within the year," Tiedoll said, with a sneer, and then sighed, "I don't like talking about that man. There was just one more item I had to address."

"Yes?" Komui asked, finishing jotting down the information.

"It seems that some Finders are becoming concerned. They are wondering why demons are prone to say that humankind is going to go to hell before they die. Most are content that God is on our side, but the others don't seem to understand war," Tiedoll murmured. Kanda could hear a cynical chuckle out of Lavi and let his eyes slide over. No one else seemed to have noticed beside Bookman, who had looked over. Well, Marie had probably heard, but he wouldn't react.

"They forgot; God is always on your side in war," Lavi murmured under his breath. Komui had started talking already, so no one except he and Marie had heard. And Bookman, who promptly reacted and scared the shit out of everyone.

WHACK!

"Ow! God, panda, what was that for?" Lavi asked, grasping his head as everyone looked over. Marie made a face. That had been quite the blow.

"Hold your tongue," Bookman growled warningly. Komui blinked and continued to talk to Tiedoll, choosing to ignore the other happenings.

Kanda was confused. Lavi had been a nuisance all day, but that one barely audible phrase was what Bookman scolded him for? And what exactly did Lavi mean by what he said?

"Thank you, General," Komui said before turning to Bookman, "Now, what did you want to ask me?"

"I'll ask to talk to you in private, as I have difficulty concentrating in crowds," Bookman said politely. Komui nodded and looked to the rest. Kanda grunted and followed the rest out of the main office and into the hallway. Tiedoll stayed behind, presumably to help answer any questions. Kanda expected the Bookman's apprentice to also remain behind, but the red head simply followed them out.

"Ok guys, I'm going to go make more coffee," Lenalee said with a smile. Marie smiled amiably and Kanda ignored her. Lavi smiled as well, his sideways grin.

"Bye Princess," he said, not unkindly. Lenalee rolled her eyes and Kanda felt himself get steamed again for some reason. However, he had a question to ask, before Marie commented on how familiar the teenager's voice was. Kanda didn't know why Lavi was called Lavi and not Remy anymore and he didn't care to know. He assumed it was a Bookman thing.

"What was that about God being on our side in war?" Kanda asked. Lavi's smile drooped and he leaned against the wall with a sigh, arms crossed.

"Keep this between us," Lavi said seriously, "But I've seen enough wars from both sides. Both sides always had God on their sides and used that as an excuse to commit some terrible atrocities. The side who wins claims to be spiritual. The side that loses blames the lack of holy intervention on the members of society they want to do without. Divine cause is a great motivator." "Oi!" someone shouted from down the hallway. The three looked over to see Reever storming over. Lavi's expression brightened immediately, like a storefront coming on after a break. He bounced upright, arms shooting up to clasp behind his head, but with a gigantic smirk.

"Hey Porcupine! Having trouble with your spines!" Lavi teased as he slowly shuffled backwards. When Reever broke into a run, Lavi bolted. Kanda watched as a trail of flour was left behind. There was no way Reever would catch him.

It was curious though. Kanda had never held any illusions about God being on the side of the exorcists. How he had been treated at the hands of the exorcists could never be something that a divine being approved of. If there was a God, then he was as sick as his creations for enjoying putting them through all of this. The cloud of flour, like fog rising up, reminded him of her, whoever she was. He could never stop searching for her. She who held the answers. She was his reason for continuing to work for the Order, the bastards who did this to him. If he didn't, he was certain the Innocence would reject him.

As Kanda probed through his own thoughts, the ones that always haunted him, Lavi came back at a languid pace. Marie had obviously resigned his question to silence in order to just listen for the answer. That was his way.

"Turns out the science department has a problem with that giant robot," Lavi smirked, "It's hungry."

Kanda closed his eyes tightly and breathed in deeply. That robot of Komui's had better stay in the science department. He did not want to deal with one of the Supervisor's inventions. Maybe he could get a mission before any more mayhem happened.

Tiedoll emerged from the Komui's office. His eyes came to Kanda. Kanda felt himself tense. He didn't think he would like what came out of his Master's mouth.

"You've grown more, Yu-kun," he said, "Soon you'll be taller than me."

Kanda felt his eyes catch fire. Irritation flamed into rage at this indignation. He clenched his fists. Marie put a hand on his shoulder and that would have kept him calm, but there was one loose factor. The idiot.

"Yu?" Lavi tested, "That's your given name? I never would have guessed it."

Kanda bared his teeth and steamed. No way. No way. Only Marie got to call him Yu. Tiedoll only got away with it because Marie liked him. There was no way this frivolous, idiotic, fake ass motherfucker was going to call him that name.

"Do not call me that, ever," Kanda growled. Marie sighed with what sounded like a tinge of a chuckle at the end and removed his hand from Kanda's shoulder. Tiedoll blinked a few times and smiled. Lavi just smiled wider.

"Why not? It's your given name and it doesn't make you sound like an Amazonian snake," Lavi said with a broad smile. Kanda snarled and reached behind him for Mugen.

"I'll slice you to pieces," he threatened, then changed his mind, "I'm going to slice you to pieces and give everyone some peace. Most importantly, me."

Lavi opened his eye and saw the scary look on Kanda's face. Kanda felt brief satisfaction as terror seeped through the boy's frame until the boy smiled and bolted. Kanda snarled again and dashed off to pursue him, completely forgetting the original reason for seeking out Komui.

He could see the boy running ahead of him and noted that he was slowly catching up. Lavi glanced back at him and abruptly turned a corner. Kanda skidded to slow down and turned. Damn, he wasn't that agile. As he turned, he noted that the hallway was more densely populated and that Lavi was dodging around the people. All of whom had come from the science department and were looking worse for wear.

"KANDA!" he heard a female exorcist shout, "Don't run with a blade out!" With a huff of annoyance, the seventeen year old sheathed Mugen before he reached the crowd and started dodging.

"Hey! That's Lavi!"

"He started the energy consumption program!"

"Idiot!"

"Last time we tell him about secret inventions..."

"Go get him, Kanda!"

The shouts from the crowd seemed to make it easier for him to get through. Almost like people parted in hopes that he would get to Lavi. However, it seemed that the red head was deliberately going through the crowd, following the stream of disgruntled scientists.

Shouting alerted him that wherever these scientists were coming from, they were getting closer. As he rounded the last corner, he noticed the red head had ducked into the cafeteria. However, he was immediately distracted by the enormous, multi-legged machine that had its "head" inside of the kitchen. Several scientists had lassoed it and were pulling it unsuccessfully. Jerri was inside the kitchen, beating it with a frying pan.

Lavi had halted, staring at the machine and scratching his head. Kanda was about to attack, but the mechanic voice caught his attention.

"Soba, must eat soba," Komurin buzzed as it pushed its head further into the kitchen. Kanda froze. Fuck no. Was nothing sacred to that idiot?

Unsheathing Mugen, he bolted over to the giant machine and jumped on top of it. Noting that the metal skin was comprised of panels and that there was a junction between the head and the neck, Kanda abruptly sliced through the weak metal with his blade. The head fell to the floor with a clunk. The rest of the machine slowly crumpled underneath him.

Standing on top of the now dead machine, Kanda turned to glare at the red head, who was effectively cornered. The science department that had been leaving to find Komui had returned at the sound of metal crumpling and was blocking the cafeteria exits. Reever, who had been one of the ones to lasso Komurin, was steaming again and cursing in what Kanda supposed was English, but sounded nothing like it. Lavi was smiling as if nothing was wrong, but Kanda could tell that the nonchalant green eye was nervously fixing on him more often. Well, he was the one with the blade.

"Hey guys, did you know that Komui was programming that thing to castrate anyone that said anything suggestive to Lenalee?" Lavi drawled. Angry looks dropped as confusion and curiosity overtook them. The red head put his hands in his pockets and smirked.

"Yeah, I was curious about it, so I cracked it open and started to read the code," Lavi said with a smirk. Reever, still steamed, finally spoke up.

"How the hell did you read that? Only a select number of this science department can read that language!" Reever yelled.

"If you want to keep it that way, you should probably remove the manual from the library," Lavi explained, "Cuz I found it in the technical section a couple days ago. Anyway, that program had a password that wasn't 'Lenalee' or 'Dearest sister' or any other easily cracked passwords, so I activated another one."

The science department hesitated at this. So, Lavi had saved them from being castrated, but he had done so by causing chaos in the building. While trying to figure out if they were to praise or condemn Lavi, Kanda made their decision for them and shot off to finish his previous task.

Lavi had apparently been paying attention, as he bolted through the crowd of scientists as soon as he saw Kanda move. With a huff, the black haired teen started shoving through the crowd.

At this rate, he would never catch up to Lavi, even with his faster speed. Still, Kanda smirked. He knew this castle like the back of his hand, unlike the exorcist who had been here less than a month.

Lavi turned into a dead end by mistake, pausing momentarily, and Kanda used this as his opportunity. He bolted forward and grabbed the boy by his scarf, yanking it.

"Khhhh!" Lavi choked at first, and then spun as the scarf unwound from around his neck. Kanda flicked his wrist and Mugen's sheath flew off. As Lavi hit the back wall, dizzy, Kanda had the blade up under the idiot's chin. He obviously did have some form of self preservation, as the gloved right hand bolted up to block the blade a little. Kanda murmured with a deadly whisper,

"Don't call me by my given name."

He glared. Sweat dripped down from Lavi's temple and he was smiling sheepishly. It was just then that Kanda noticed a scar, right along the base of the kid's neck, just a shade paler than the other skin and much knottier. He hadn't noticed it before because it was always hidden behind the scarf or under a bandana. Distracted for a second by the scar, Kanda was taken off guard when Lavi pushed the blade away with his hand and jumped up. As Mugen stuck into the wall, Lavi landed on top of it for a split second before stepping onto the other's shoulders and rocketing off them.

Kanda stumbled forward, embedding the blade a little further into the wall. He growled and yanked it free as he heard the door slam behind him. Well, the idiot had escaped this time, Kanda thought as he observed his blade. As he suspected, a fine amount of blood had splotched the Innocence impregnated steel. Lavi had injured himself to escape. Kanda let the blade fall and sighed.

Reever opened the door he was in and looked in. He was still covered in flour, but to a lesser extent. Kanda looked up expectantly.

"We examined the robot's system. Lavi was telling the truth. The kid learned the language that took most of us years to understand well enough in two days to read Komui's unfinished program, try to change it, then change a program in another section of the robot," Reever explained.

"Che," Kanda scoffed, "I don't give a shit about that idiot."

* * *

><p>Thank you for reading! Chapter 4 will be up shortly. I just like to have a chapter already written before I publish anything.<p> 


	4. Rabbit

I was late...I'm sorry. Kanda's kinda ooc here, but I had to make them start being friends somehow...outside of the battlefield. It's also kind of saccharine.

* * *

><p><strong>Rabbit<strong>

**"Unless someone like you cares an awful lot, it's not going to get any better, it's not"**

Kanda breathed in and out once more before heading to the edge of the clearing where he'd left his shirt. The entire forest resonated with peace, as if he were utterly alone. He felt like he was the only thing alive in this entire place. It was exhilarating. Breathing in the deadly still air of the forest, he buttoned his shirt back up and reached for where he had hung Mugen on a branch. Time to go back to the idiots. Back to the noise and the chaos. Back to the search. Back to life.

He strode lightly through the underbrush. No paths led to the clearing because paths meant people following them. Besides, the only sound in the entire forest was the breathing only he could hear from his lungs.

As he strode out of the forest, he couldn't help but notice the red headed teenager kneeling in front of a pen of the Order's farm. The Order grew and raised their own food. From fruits and vegetables to livestock, the secret to Jerri's abilities was the abundant supply between the Tower and the forest behind it. It appeared that the more annoying of the exorcists had ventured out back and found the food stock. More specifically, he had found the rabbit pen and was now kneeling in the rapidly drying, dew wettened grass.

Curious, Kanda walked over to where Lavi was kneeling. He was practiced in moving without a sound, especially in the forest where there were no sounds, so he didn't think to alert Lavi of his presence, giving him a good look of the genuine, sad look the red head was giving the rabbits as he poked little pieces of green grass through the chicken wire at them.

"What are you doing?" Kanda asked abruptly. Lavi jumped and yelped. He whirled around and planted himself on his ass, terrified, staring up at Kanda.

"God, Yu, make a noise or something," Lavi gasped. Kanda glared but otherwise chose to ignore his first name for the time being. He was curious. Lavi breathed in deeply and turned to face the rabbits again with his pants wet. He stared at the little, brown, furry creatures that were huddled by him in the pen, "I forgot that Jerri said they served rabbit."

"So?" Kanda asked, confused. That had been a while ago. Lavi poked another piece of grass inside. Kanda watched as the animal chewed on the blade, its nose wiggling. Lavi sighed sadly.

"I just really like rabbits," Lavi murmured in a very un-Lavi like voice, sounding almost childish, "They just live peacefully with no ulterior motives. They don't torture each other or kill one another for senseless reasons." Kanda huffed.

"Don't they eat their babies?" he asked. Lavi looked back at him with his one dull green eye. Almost bored. And a little bit sad.

"Yeah, if a predator is nearby," Lavi murmured, "And they say that rabbits eat them in order to conserve the resources, because the babies aren't going to live long anyway. I always thought that the mothers just didn't want to bring their babies into a world of agony. Kinda wish human mothers did that as well."

Kanda shifted from one foot to another. There was something uncomfortable he was feeling. And it wasn't like he should be feeling it. I mean, these were animals to be eaten. But they were...cute.

"So what do you think you should do about them?" Kanda asked, nodding towards the rabbits, "You can't set them free. They'd die in the wild."

Lavi nodded slowly, thoughtfully. Kanda looked from the boy staring through the chain link fence at the rabbits to the rabbits staring through the chain link fence at the boy and sighed. He reached into the pen and grasped one of the rabbits behind the shoulders. The fur was much softer than he had figured. He awkwardly lifted it and held it out to Lavi. Lavi looked up at Kanda with a confused look. Kanda moved it slightly up and down, as it sniffed around in confusion, indicating Lavi should take it.

"No, no, no," Lavi said, crawling backwards in the grass. Kanda brought the rabbit into his own arms, raising an eyebrow. The weight of the animal was warm and it seemed content to rest in his arms, sniffing around. Lavi shook his head, "If I hold it, I'll get attached to it. If I get attached to it, I'll just be hurt when it get's killed."

Kanda huffed and leaned down, depositing the rabbit into Lavi's lap. Lavi shuffled around awkwardly, unwilling to drop the fat, furry bundle, but unwilling to bring it in. The creature turned in the boy's arms and looked up in his face, snuffling at him. It had a white spot across its eye. The boy's eye softened and he stroked it's long ears as it nibbled on his sleeve.

"The only way you can fix things is if you care about them. If you want to save them, just talk to Jerri. He'll probably be sympathetic," Kanda murmured, "He stopped serving veal when Lenalee confronted him. He'll probably just keep them as pets."

Lavi nodded and buried his face in the soft fur of the rabbit, breathing in a deep breath. Kanda put his hand on his hip and watched.

"Thanks, Yu," Lavi murmured. Kanda tensed. His eyes flashed and Mugen was quickly unsheathed. Lavi flinched and hurriedly set the rabbit back in its pen.

"I told you, do not call me by my given name," Kanda growled. Terror lighted through Lavi's eyes and he smiled waveringly before dashing off towards the forest. Kanda bared his teeth and began running after him. He could not let the kid get away with calling him his given name.

He dove in and out of trees, knowing this forest by heart. Meanwhile, he heard Lavi stumbling up ahead. The fucker was faster and more energetic and easily scared into running for his life, but he didn't know this forest like Kanda did. Following the trail quickly, Kanda smiled when he realized that Lavi was headed for the clearing.

Sure enough, when Lavi reached the clearing, he stumbled over the lack of resistance and went head over heels. He landed on his head, then fell back to his hands and knees, ass in the air. Kanda, still running, landed a solid kick to it, effectively flipping Lavi over onto his back.

"Owwwwwww!" Lavi cried out, clutching his behind and writhing around for a moment, "God, why do you have to be so meaaaaan!" He said as he rolled to his stomach and started to get up, rubbing his head. Kanda folded his arms and glared. No one had the right to call him Yu except for maybe Marie. Not anymore. Even Tiedoll, who had given him the name Kanda, was pushing it when he called him Yu. And this rabbit needed to get it through his thick skull.

"Don't fucking call me that name," Kanda seethed. Lavi groaned and finally looked up. The indignation and pain faded abruptly as Lavi looked around at the clearing, sitting up on his knees.

"Whoa," Lavi gasped. Kanda huffed and stared at the boy, who turned his gaze to Kanda. His green eye was wide with curiosity, "Is this where you go every morning?"

Kanda tensed. He hadn't known that his ritual was observed.

"Does everyone know that I go into the forest in the morning?" He asked tersely. Lavi held up his hands defensively.

"No, no, it's just my job to notice things..." Lavi said, taking the entire clearing in. A smile went across his face, "This place suits you." Kanda blinked.

"What do you mean?" Kanda had his own theories, but Lavi had interesting ones.

"I mean, it's alive," Lavi said, "It's a part of nature without any real bonds. It's peaceful on the surface, but there are so many little things in it that make it live," then he blushed and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, "That sounded kinda cheesy."

Kanda stared at the red head. Something was different. There was something past the chronicler there and something past the idiot, again. He was curious.

"What do you mean, alive? There's never anything here," Kanda said harshly. Lavi shook his head and pointed. Kanda followed his finger to the birds feeding just beyond the tree line. Suddenly, it seemed that all he could hear were the birds singing. Chirping, trilling, whistling, cawing. Filling his ears with different sounds. Lavi pointed at a different spot. Kanda looked but couldn't see anything.

"What?" he asked. Lavi smirked.

"It's kind of far off, but a herd of deer are feeding over there," Lavi murmured. Kanda looked and slowly, the group of flickering eared animals came into view about thirty yards off from the clearing.

Kanda blinked and it seemed that his entire clearing was filled with wildlife. Yellow and blue butterflies hovered over tiny white flowers. Bees nuzzled into the blossoms on one of the trees. The sound of running water could be heard and dragonflies zipped around.

"You really need to open your eyes, Yu," Lavi said with a smile. Kanda whirled without a sound or any indication and used Mugen's sheath on Lavi's neck to pin the boy to the ground. He glared down at the boy.

"Do you have a fucking death wish?" Kanda asked, pressing enough to make it difficult to breath. Suddenly, a pair of legs were around his waist and Lavi smirked, yanking him backwards. About two seconds before his head made an embarrassing encounter with the ground, Kanda twisted and landed on his feet. Lavi smirked and jumped upward into a crouched position. Kanda's eyes widened a split second before Lavi shot off the ground and tackled him around the stomach, knocking the air out of him.

However, super human strength came in handy. Kanda gripped Lavi around the waist and pulled up, inverting the red head as he planted his feet on the ground. He wasn't, however, prepared for the legs wrapping around his head and yanking him forward so he lost his balance and toppled over.

"Oof!" Lavi grunted as he landed on the ground with Kanda on top of him. Kanda growled and took advantage of the lack of air in Lavi's lungs by spinning around and gripping both of the boy's arms, wrenching them up into a painful hold.

"Aieeeeeeee!" Lavi squealed as his arms were wrenched backwards by a steel grip. He struggled for a while against the hold before completely relaxing.

"Do you promise to never call me that name again?" Kanda asked, subconsciously loosening his grip because of the slackening of his victim's muscles. Lavi smirked and lashed out with his entire body, dislodging the grip and escaping. He bounced to the edge of the clearing and smirked.

"Sorry, Yu, no can do," Lavi cackled as he bolted through the forest. With a sigh, Kanda followed after him. He strode rapidly after the red head, listening ahead for the sound of Lavi bouncing over the underbrush. He could hear the second that Lavi emerged from the forest. Great, now he'd be in open land and Kanda could use dead speed to catch him.

A scream like a woman's caused a chill to run through Kanda's spine. Panicking, he drew his sword, thinking someone was being killed. Emerging from the forest, Kanda knew something was wrong. Lavi was standing stock still in the middle of the clearing, staring at the rabbit pen. Kanda came to a halt beside him. He realized that Farmer Tubble was in the pen, chasing the rabbits around. In his arm was a dead rabbit, dangling limply.

"Told you caring hurts," Lavi murmured dully, "Did you know rabbits scream like humans?" The red head watched as the farmer went to grab another rabbit, the one Lavi had held. The one with the white patch over its eye. Kanda stared at Lavi, who was smiling vaguely and relaxed, as if withdrawing from the world.

"Idiot," Kanda growled, "Hey! Wait!" he yelled at Farmer Tubble, who blinked up at the two. He started striding towards the farmer purposefully, snapping back at Lavi "If you care about them, then fucking do something instead of standing around, idiot. That's the price of caring." He huffed angrily and strode the rest of the way to Tubble, who was staring blankly at him, unable to tell who it was at first. Kanda motioned for Lavi to follow him. What was wrong with him?

"Hey Kanda, Lavi," Tubble said with a friendly smile, rubbing his fat belly through his dirty shirt, "What are you two up to?" Kanda looked at Lavi with a glare. Lavi spoke up abruptly.

"Hey, um, I really like rabbits," Lavi said, at first timidly and more than a little uncomfortably, "And I don't really want them killed. I was planning on talking to Jerri about taking them off the menu."

Tubble blinked and rubbed the back of his head, "Well, these here animals were raised as food stuffs. I don't know how well the boss would take to wasting them."

"Can we just talk to him before you kill anymore?" Lavi asked pleadingly. Tubble shrugged.

"Can't hurt," Tubble said as he strode off, leaving the dead rabbit hanging on the fence, "Just come back and let me know what I'm supposed to do with them."

Kanda turned to Lavi, who was looking sadly at the dead rabbit and was reaching down to stroke the trembling creatures in the pen. With a huff, Kanda yanked the bandana off of Lavi's head and batted down the stray hairs. Lavi yelped and made a grab for the bandana, but Kanda just pocketed it.

"Stop," Kanda said tersely, "You need to look as adorable as possible. That's how Lenalee gets people to do stuff for her." He leaned down and scooped up the fat, white patched rabbit and dumped it in Lavi's arms. Lavi blinked as Kanda looked him up and down before shoving him forward and into the building. Lavi found himself hustled through the hallways that he'd only briefly been in. For once, he was grateful that no one was around to see him carrying a fat rabbit through the castle.

Kanda stopped at the back door of the kitchen and knocked. After a few moments, Jerri opened the door with a look of irritation that quickly merged into curiosity. He looked down at the two teenage boys, one a seemingly heartless asshole and the other clutching a rabbit, that looked determined about something.

"What can I help you boys with," Jerri said with a kind smile. He had a special place in his heart for kid exorcists. Especially cute ones holding rabbits.

"Lavi likes rabbits," Kanda said bluntly, not really knowing how to approach it tactfully, then shoved Lavi forward. Jerri looked down at Lavi, who smiled up shyly in a very un-Lavi-like manner.

"I, uh, I just really like rabbits," Lavi said quietly, hair hanging in his eyes, hugging the rabbit close to him, "They're just really innocent and cute and stuff. I just wish you would stop serving them as food."

Jerri smiled wider. Lavi and Kanda looked up at him in anticipation, but he just smiled even wider and laughed. Thinking he was laughing at them, they looked at each other annoyed.

"You kids," Jerri laughed, "Always asking to take the adorable things off the menu. I just never expected you two. Sure, the rabbits are all yours, just don't start falling in love with the chickens or cows and we won't starve. Now," Jerri said and, walking away from the doorway, lifted a towel that was draped over a basket of freshly baked biscuits, plucked a few out, buttered and jammed them, and wrapped them in a clean dishcloth. He walked back over to the two boys, handed Kanda the bundle, then grabbed the door, "I have breakfast to make," and he closed the door.

Kanda stared at the bundle in his arms and humphed. He had been planning on eating soba. Still, the dishcloth was warm and they were wafting up a heavenly smell. A giggle came from next to him, causing him to look over. The rabbit was nibbling on Lavi's left earring and he was giggling, snuggling in its fur. It was so sweet it was sickening.

Kanda started walking back to the farm, warm bundle in his arms. Lavi bounced after him, warm bundle in his arms. Once they were out back once more, bright sun warm on their backs, Kanda felt himself sigh. Why the fuck had he done that? Saving small mammals wasn't in him.

Lavi strode beside him, arms wrapped around the rabbit. Kanda glanced over and noticed that Lavi was walking with his eye patch toward him. That was uncommon. Usually, Lavi kept his seeing eye to everyone except Bookman, jealously guarding his blind spot.

Tubble was busy scooping corn up into a bucket. Lavi saw him and bounced happily over, jolting the poor rabbit in his arms. The heavy set man looked up with a smile.

"I take it he took bunny off the menu?" Tubble asked. Lavi nodded. Tubble nodded his head in return before getting back to work. Lavi shifted the rabbit in his arms and moved over to the rabbit pen. It was the pen closest to the forest, with a hut where they sheltered at night time. Lavi stepped over the chicken wire and released the rabbit to get on with its life before it had been disrupted by diplomatic affairs. It snuffled the rest of them before slowly shuffling around in search of food.

Kanda sat on top of the hut, feeling awkward. He didn't spend time with people. He didn't like spending time with people. However, somehow he had been suckered into spending his morning with the red head and he didn't particularly mind it. The main reason, he decided, was that he didn't mind animals and he didn't mind Lavi when he wasn't being an idiot.

Instead of pondering this any further, he opened up the bundle in his lap filled with biscuits. The smell hit his nose and made his stomach quake excitedly. He loved soba, more than most things in the world, but these looked heavenly. Lavi sat down next to him on the hut and snagged one, nibbling at the edges. Kanda's eyelids drooped. He even had to fucking eat like a rabbit.

Kanda took a bite out of the warm biscuit and closed his eyes. God, that was good. He looked over at Lavi, who a weird sparkle in his eye.

"There's a book I read published not too long ago," Lavi murmured, "Discussing natural selection as a tool for evolution."

Oh boy, Kanda thought, he was going to get a nerd rant.

"This naturalist observed that animals change according to their surroundings by having certain traits that allow them to survive better in their environment," Lavi explained, "He observed it in finches on different islands."

"What the fuck is a finch?" Kanda asked through a mouthful of biscuit.

"A type of bird," Lavi said, "He noticed that on islands with more hard nuts, birds with big beaks got more food and produced more offspring, meaning that birds on that island started to get bigger beaks. Some finches had small beaks to better catch insects. Some learned to use cactus spikes to hunt for bugs inside of wood."

"So?" Kanda asked, taking another biscuit. Lavi was too busy talking to finish his. That was his loss.

"So, all of these finches had a common ancestor," Lavi said, "They all came from one type of finch and branched off. And we can see that certain animals are just adaptations of others." Kanda watched as the white patched rabbit found its way to the hut and sniffed up at Lavi, who broke off a piece and fed it to the rabbit. Kanda whacked him on the arm.

"Idiot, rabbits don't eat biscuits," Kanda scolded. Lavi leaned back. Kanda suddenly remembered he had the boy's bandana still. He wondered how long he could hang onto it unnoticed. Just as payback for the whole Yu thing.

"All animals come from other animals," Lavi said with a smirk, "And through thousands of years, they look differently."

Kanda nodded. That actually made some sense. Not like the books Tiedoll tried to get him to read, but like when Komui explained a few things to him. And more than that, it made him feel more sure in his realization that the Church was wrong about their view on everything.

Lavi finished his biscuit before reaching for another, only to find his second one gone.

"Yu!" Lavi whined, "You ate my other biscuit." "Che," Kanda said, "If you wanted it, maybe you shouldn't have blabbed about finches and eaten your fucking biscuit."

Lavi narrowed his eye for a second before reaching down and grabbing a rabbit and plopping it in Kanda's lap. Kanda blinked for a second. Why...?

The question was soon answered when Lavi whipped the bandana out of Kanda's pocket, then whipped his scarf over Kanda's face, enshrouding him in darkness.

"IDIOT!" Kanda yelled as he felt the scarf grip his face as Lavi tied it around his head. The familiar tightness of his scalp loosened and he felt his hair fall. Then he heard scampering.

Stumbling, Kanda set down the rabbit and took off after the asshole. He just couldn't get a grip on this kid.

* * *

><p>Thank you for reading. I will get another up shortly. Happy Easter ;)<p> 


	5. Doctor

Sorry about the wait. I recently discovered the anime Ouran High School Host Club and went through the same psychological breakdown I go through every time I watch Funimation...with Edward Elric as Tamaki, Komui/Sebastien as Kyoya, Allen Walker as the Hikaru(the seme half of a fake twincest relationship), and Kanda/Roy Mustang as Mori. Then I saw a clip in Japanese and realized that the same person who voices Lavi also voices Hikaru. Which was a second psychological shock.

So...got distracted.

* * *

><p>Ow. The first thing that registered in Kanda's mind was pain. Pain across his entire body. For a second, Kanda thought he was being destroyed. If that was so, then it should be fitting that all he knew was pain and cold and wet and darkness. Like the lotus he always saw on the fringes of his perception, this was how he should die, sinking into the mire. However, the pain in his chest was not from being destroyed, but rather from being rebuilt. He was not dying.<p>

This established, his brain started to sort out some of the fuzziness. A feeling of deja vu sat heavily in his mind. This struggle for memories came so often that it was familiar. However, he tamped down the urge to try to remember and focused on his situation.

None of his limbs would move on their own. Any attempts were met with excruciating pain. However, he did know that he was moving. His body was on top of something being pulled over many bumps, all of which hurt. He was also under something. There was just a lot of somethings.

He creaked his eyes open. Above him was a starry sky that was both moving and spinning. With a groan, he closed them again.

"Ah, you are alive," a familiar voice murmured, "Miracle enough as it is, are you still cognitive?" The voice was slow and quiet, which for some reason struck Kanda as odd. He opened his mouth slowly. It was dry and sticky. He was thirsty.

"How...long?" God that hurt. His lungs didn't want to function and his jaw was creaky.

"How long what? How long have you been out? About an hour," the voice replied, "All my medical supplies are in the cabin, which is still about ten minutes from here."

Kanda breathed in deeply, feeling his ribs crack a little. He tried licking his lips. Nope. That didn't help the thirst.

"Wa...ter?" he murmured. The sled stopped. He heard rustling. Then there was the opening of a canteen pressed to his lips. A thin trickled slid over his tongue and down his throat. He coughed, which felt like it ripped his body apart all over again. Another trickle came in and he was able to catch and swallow it. He opened his eyes. They blurred and spun, but he could see red hair. Lavi.

The canteen was soon gone and they were moving again. He could feel blood seeping out, slowing his healing. He wondered how much his body had been damaged before he'd had the hour to heal.

After what seemed like forever, they stopped again. This time, warm light bathed Kanda's eyelids. He cracked them open and found his vision had cleared. Lavi, not wearing his coat, leaned over him. Kanda glared, unable to do anything else to protect his dignity.

Slowly, arms slid under his torso and beneath his knees. Kanda was lifted up, causing a rush to his head. He curled unconsciously. Still, nothing stopped his ascent. Lavi carried him to the bed and settled him on it. The red head pulled Kanda's covering off, revealing it to be his coat.

Kanda closed his eyes again against the terrible headache. He was bleeding somewhere, he could feel it. Lavi seemed to know this, as clinical hands pulled off pieces of his wet clothing. A sheet draped over him and his pants were tugged off.

Those same clinical hands rolled him over and prodded at what felt like a pretty large gash.

"What the fuck happened?" Kanda asked, pleased that he could talk normally. Lavi looked up at him seriously, then smirked and shook his head. He reached over with a boot and pulled his medical kit over. It popped open and Lavi grabbed a leather kit from within it.

"Well, we were both pretty beat up, you especially," Lavi explained, untying the leather roll and opening it. Several shiny surgical tools were fastened into the leather. Lavi continued, "However, flesh wounds don't affect you." Kanda watched as a shiny needle was pulled out and threaded. Lovely.

"When I had the Innocence and the last demon we were battling exploded, you were thrown over a cliff," Lavi said, pulling a clear glass bottle out of the box. He soused a rag with it and began dabbing at that gash on his back. Kanda repressed a hiss. He could feel his mind getting clearer and clearer.

"You fell about fifty feet and smacked into the sharp, jagged rocks at the bottom," Lavi said clinically, although he sounded a bit wry, "You got caught between a few of them and stayed there, getting hit with waves, until I extended down and grabbed you. Although I was pretty sure you were dead, in spite of your healing capabilities."

Kanda twitched when the needle went in, but comparatively, it was like a mosquito. He felt his interior knitting together while Lavi knitted the exterior.

"Your skull was caved in a couple places," Lavi said, "Your spine was snapped. I'm pretty sure your entire rib cage was caved. Not to mention you were gushing blood."

Kanda didn't exactly know what that tone of voice was, but it wasn't plain irritation. He turned his head, ouch, but he couldn't get a glimpse of Lavi's face. The red head leaned down and Kanda could hear teeth snap together and thread snap. Before he moved to the next gash, Kanda watched a motion that looked like Lavi was wiping his eyes. Why?

"However, as I started a fire to dry myself off and possibly cremate you, your tattoo glowed. Your skull began to bulge outward as I dried myself. Your heart started beating again, which I could tell because one of the gashes that had stopped gushing started again. Your lungs tried to breathe again, but you had water in your lungs," Lavi explained as he finished the next gash and moved on to another one on Kanda's thigh.

"So, I rolled you over and pushed on your back until the water came out and you stopped coughing. Your torso was pretty mushy, but it seemed that your healing powers were pretty preoccupied with your head. I tied off your arteriole gash to give it a boost," Lavi explained and swiped at his eyes again. Kanda realized that the teenager's hands were cold and bare when a few pieces of gauze were taped over the stitches and a few other incisions.

"Ok, time to roll over," Lavi murmured and gripped Kanda's upper arm, pushing his lower back over until he was on his back again. A shudder ran through his body, so Lavi grabbed the heavy woolen blanket from beside the fire and covered Kanda in it, keeping his face tilted away from Kanda.

He watched as his doctor shuffled around the cabin, dropping more wood on the fire, pushing a cast iron pot near it, dumping water into it, breaking handfuls of dry stuff into it. Lavi returned, wearing a stoic expression, and placed a leather belt between Kanda's teeth. He ran a hand down Kanda's leg to an odd looking breakage. Kanda breathed in deeply. Lavi pulled. Kanda nearly bit through the belt. Lavi repeated the action with his other leg, only higher up. He left him lying down.

Kanda was still fucking cold, despite the blanket and the sweat rolling down his temple. Lavi stirred at the pot and stared at the fire. After a while, he got up and scooped up some of the stuff in the pot into a tin cup and brought it to Kanda.

"You lost a lot of blood and are probably suffering from hypothermia," Lavi murmured, shuffling his hand under the sword wielder's torso and propping him upright. Kanda groaned as his brain wobbled. It probably still wasn't 100% after being smooshed.

Lavi held the cup to his lips and forced it down. His nose wrinkled at the flavor. Rehydrated beef jerky and dried onions didn't a tasty meal make. However, he ate all of it and felt warmer. He then drank the rest of the canteen of water that was offered to him. Finally satisfied that he had nutrients to replenish blood, Lavi set him back down to allow his body to continue knitting itself back together.

For about an hour, Kanda had little distracting him from the soreness and sharp stabbing pains of regrowth. Lavi rested in the chair next to him. His eye was open, but it looked almost like a meditative trance. It wasn't enough to distract him for long.

However, after an hour, Kanda felt a fever envelope his body. That was his regenerative ability's way of vaporizing any infections. It also provoked allergies to the dust in the room. Lavi looked over when he started shivering violently. Kanda felt himself fade in and out of consciousness. A cold hand appeared on his forehead, then a cool rag. He sneezed violently and felt his eyes water. The rag wiped them.

After about an hour of the high fever, it broke and caused him to sweat. After he was done sweating, he felt uncomfortable until the sheets were yanked out from around him and he was left on the mattress and under the woolen blanket. He rolled over and fell asleep.

He didn't know how long he had been asleep. The sun shone from outside and the fire had been stoked since he had passed out. Looking around, he noted his doctor had not moved, eye still closed, but breathing too regulated to be sleeping. He sat upright and stretched. His joints popped and stitches fell off.

Lavi opened his eye and looked at Kanda with a smile.

"You're finally awake," he murmured quietly.

"Che," Kanda said, "You could have slept. I didn't need you to watch over me like I'm some type of invalid." Walking over to where his clothing was hanging in front of the fire, he pulled them on roughly before saying, "So, are we ready to head out?"

"Whenever you want, boss," Lavi smirked as he stood and stretched. He pulled on his coat, pulled his bandana up, and wound his scarf around his neck. Kanda watched as he picked up the medical box and lazily followed him.

As they left the cabin, Kanda compared the memories that had returned to the ones that Lavi had given him and realized that his doctor had omitted the part where Kanda had pushed Lavi away from the cliff before the demon had exploded.

* * *

><p>Thank you for reading :) Happy Easter<p> 


	6. Patient

Je suis desole ;_; I have been neglecting you guys. I got into No.6 and it's beautiful theme of knowledge that tied into the Souls of Black Folk that I read for a class and had an existential crisis. Then I went to ACEN. Then I got into Hetalia. And I have a final tomorrow for French ^_^'

Although what I really should be apologizing for is the sheer volume of Lavi torture that I do in this because I'm a sadist that likes when my favorite characters tremble and cry.

* * *

><p>The problem with humans, Kanda thought, was that their bodies were weaker than their will power. That was the reason he now had to deal with a feverish comrade. Because the idiot had decided to keep quiet about ailments and push his limits.<p>

He hadn't noticed at first that something was off about the red head. After all, he was preoccupied by his frustration that the train had been delayed due to a mechanical error (which never would have happened in Germany). He was also preoccupied by the fact that it was pouring and the train station was closed. Only a sign hastily plastered at the train stop showed any hospitality whatsoever, leaving them standing around in pouring down rain.

To be fair, he had noticed how quiet Lavi had been since he had woken up after having his head smashed in, but he had respected the other's privacy. After the rain started, he hadn't taken much note of the way the red head weaved and stumbled behind him in his haste to find the train.

Then Lavi collapsed. He had wobbled near to Kanda, made a small noise, and promptly passed out. Reflex alone was what kept his face from meeting the cobblestones as Kanda grabbed his collar.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Kanda had asked shaking the collar slightly and watching Lavi's head loll around listlessly. He put his other hand against the wet skin of his comrade's face and was surprised by the heat radiating off of him. Something was wrong.

As icy water slid down the back of his neck, Kanda grabbed Lavi's arms and looped them around his neck, pulling him onto his back. Even through the dense material of their clothing, Kanda could feel the heat radiating from the other. Turning back to the small town, he set towards the small inn.

Superior strength made the trek less lengthy, but he and his cargo were both soaked by the time he reached the inn. After he got through the doorway, his cargo had started to come awake.

"Whasgoinon?" Lavi mumbled, then abruptly pulled away from Kanda, "Shit, I'm so sorry, Yu, I musta gotten sick or somethin." "Don't call me that," Kanda growled, "You passed out at the train station. The train isn't getting here for another two days." With that, he turned to the innkeeper, a slight blonde. From the stories that others circulated, this was one of those that Lavi drooled over. However, he seemed utterly uninterested in anything except the air in front of his face.

Kanda paid for their room and started up the stairs, keeping an eye on the wobbly red head following him. The room was on the end of the hall and had a pipe from the furnace running through it.

Dropping his satchel, he hurriedly unfastened his coat. His shirt was damp, but the rest of him was pretty dry thanks to the repellant built into the exorcist coat. He hung the two damp items near the pipe and toweled himself off with one of the warm towels left for guests on the wash stand. Then he looked over at his comrade.

Who was still trying to figure out the buttons on his coat while his hands shook from shivers. Water dripped off of him into a puddle near the door. He looked pathetic. With a huff, Kanda stormed over and unfastened the buttons. Heat radiated off of Lavi, despite the fierce shivering.

Kanda started when Lavi's forehead fell forward against his shoulder as he was unzipping the coat. Kanda realized that some of the trembling was due to weakness. He pushed the coat off of Lavi's shoulders where it fell with a heavy thump to the ground with the scarf.

With one shaking hand, Lavi reached up and dragged his bandana down around his neck. The black haired exorcist blinked. He already knew about the scar, why would Lavi choose to be self-conscious about it now? He pushed the question back for now, working on peeling the shirt off.

"N-noooooo," Lavi moaned, despite being unable to lift his head from Kanda's shoulder, "Don't take it off."

"Idiot, there's no way you're going into bed sick with this thing on," Kanda grumbled as he pulled at the shirt. At that moment, Lavi lost all strength in his legs and collapsed again. Kanda grabbed him under the armpits and hefted him towards the bed.

"M'sorry, ddn't mean it," Lavi mumbled.

"It's not your fault," Kanda grumbled under his breath as he shoved Lavi onto the bed and pulled off the shirt before any more protests could come out. A shudder ran down his spine and his throat constricted. Scars carved into the pale flesh of Lavi's body. Kanda couldn't help but reach out and trace one of the raised scars, provoking a moan from his comrade. Kanda set his teeth and removed his hand, determinedly putting the questions from his mind. To each his own past.

He pulled off Lavi's boots and hesitated at the tight pants. There was no way that Lavi could wear underwear with those. Kanda didn't want to deal with that. However, they were cold, wet, sodden, and leaving a wet mark on the bed. Staring at the pants, Kanda tried to think of what to do. Lavi had stripped him indiscriminately, but he had done so under a sheet and because he was a trained medic.

Fuck it, Kanda thought, it's this asshole's fault for getting sick, it's his embarrassment. He unzipped the pants and yanked them off. He averted his eyes, feeling a blush prickle across his entire face regardless. Sure, he had bathed with other men, but he had never had to undress them while they lay unconscious.

He threw a towel over Lavi to preserve what little modesty the boy had left. He was at least glad that the kid wasn't as skinny as he had been when he first became an exorcist.

Kanda pushed Lavi under the covers of the bed and tensed when a hand shot out and grabbed his ponytail.

"Oi, lemme go," he protested, but the feverish grip was strong.

"Please dun leave me!" Lavi whimpered, shuddering all over. Kanda sighed and knelt down, working the tightly clasped fingers out of his hair. The red head was soaking wet with sweat and blushing. He was obviously delusional, "Dun lea' me 'loneagain!"

"Fine," Kanda caved, and the fingers shifted from ripping his hair out to clasping his hand weakly. Kanda sighed and pulled up a chair.

For the next four hours, Kanda realized that sickness for Lavi was an experience to be avoided at all cost. No wonder he was so careful about sanitation. The entire time, Lavi thrashed around weakly, burning with a fever, and moaning about memories. When he had left to get a bucket of cold water and a rag, Kanda had come back to a sobbing ball of an exorcist. He eventually gave up and climbed into the bed with him, making sure that the sheet was wrapped tightly several times around the other. For about half an hour, Lavi just clung to him as he pressed the cold cloth against his forehead.

Eventually, after several hours, Lavi's fever went down enough for exhaustion to take over and knock him out. Kanda extricated himself from the bed and grimaced when he realized his pants were all damp with sweat. He left to take advantage of the bath the innkeeper had boasted about.

The heated tub of water felt amazing, but Kanda didn't take the time to properly enjoy it, worrying about his sick comrade. After he rinsed off thoroughly and his pants had dried off net to the boiler, he hurried back up the stairs.

He needn't have worried, as Lavi was still sleeping deeply. He put his now dry shirt on and moved closer to the sleeping redhead. Kanda frowned when he realized the eye-patch was at an odd angle, gouging into the skin beneath the patient's eye. With one finger, he gently pulled at the patch.

"NO!" Lavi screamed, scaring the shit out of Kanda. He flew backward to avoid the fist that came his way, landing across the room on his ass. Lavi's body flew back against the wall and he curled up, his arms shielding his head. His red hair hung limply all around his face as his shoulder's shook. He looked fragile...vulnerable.

"Hey L-Lavi, calm down," Kanda said sternly, "I'm not going to hurt you."

"Yu," Lavi murmured, recognizing Kanda, and lifting his head up. Tears welled up at the corner of his eye and one dripped down. He shuddered again and tensed abruptly, hands going up to clasp at his covered eye. Suddenly, he screamed again, this time in agony, his toes curling and fingers convulsing.

Kanda found himself keeling in front of Lavi, grabbing his shoulders. The skin was freezing under his fingers. He didn't know what to do, but some of the frenzy went out of Lavi's eyes when Kanda grabbed him. When he stopped screaming, Lavi's face fell forward against Kanda's chest. One hand left his eye patch to grasp Kanda's shirt.

There was knocking on the door. Kanda bit his lip and stood up to answer it. The blonde innkeeper was on the other side, grasping something under her apron.

"I heard screaming," she murmured, "I need to check the room."

"He's sick and is having convulsions," Kanda explained, opening the door to show her Lavi's form curled on the bed.

"I will get you some more towels and sheets," the innkeeper responded quietly, her blue eyes softening just a little bit. Kanda nodded and watched as she opened a door with a key and pulled out a stack of clean linens and towels. He nodded at her and closed the door.

He dropped the stack on the bed and pulled sheet off the top and wrapping it around Lavi's shoulders. The red head's entire body was tense and he was shaking, clutching his eye. Blood trickled from a bite on his lip. Another pain spasm seemed to be coursing through him. Feeling awkward, Kanda sat down across from him and wrapped his arms around the shuddering frame. Some of the tension drained out and Kanda could feel a hand curling into his shirt. Lavi's forehead pressed against his shoulder.

"Th-thank you," Lavi whispered. Kanda grunted. Lavi's tension drained out completely and he went limp in Kanda's arms, panting softly, "Why are you doing this anyway? Surely you don't want to be a pillow for a crying, feverish fool all night." Kanda didn't answer because he didn't know why he was helping Lavi. It wasn't like it mattered anyway, as Lavi drifted to sleep a moment later and became a dead weight. Slowly, Kanda maneuvered Lavi's body under the heavy blanket. His own arms were shaking from exhaustion and the blanket felt irresistibly warm and his body was making his eyes close. He scooted under the blanket and found a comfortable position. He would just nap for a few moments.

_"You idiot, you fucking idiot," he heard a voice hissing, clogged with emotion, "Of course you would fucking do this. Fucking die on me like everyone else. I hate you so much." _

_Kanda couldn't see anything and all he could feel was cold and wet. Someone else was there, talking to him, but he couldn't figure them out. It felt like he was sinking. He wondered if this was it for him. He couldn't think. There were no memories and no thoughts beside that of observation. The sinking sensation was almost pleasant as was the darkness. He was fine with this cold too. _

_"To think you'd be the one to teach me about letting myself get attached and then you'd leave," the voice was back, nagging at the back of his mind, standing out in the darkness, "I thought you were safe, because you were strong. But I was wrong. You didn't know this, but you ripped those hooks out of me when you fell." _

_Something hot pressed against his left eye. Really hot. Then his right eye. They were lips. Then they pressed against his lips. He felt like they were scalding him. A hand grasped his, but it felt more like a flame caressing him. He was being lifted up out of the darkness by that heat. _

_Something hot and wet and salty hit his lips and slid into his mouth. The flame holding his hand tightened. The lips touched his lips yet again. He felt himself being set aflame, like that tear had been oil and those lips had been a hot coal and that kiss had been the combustion of his body. His tattoo sizzled. All of his body burned. It was agony. He sucked in a breath and felt his lungs burning. He coughed and it was agony._

_"You're alive?" the voice asked incredulously, "How?" _

_He was flipped onto his stomach and something beat his back. The lady from his dreams appeared first. Then the name of the person beating on his back, the one who had set him aflame, Lavi. His lungs functioned by themselves and his healing powers shut off his mind to protect him from the agony of recovery. _

Kanda's eyes shot wide open. He had been through that dream. Those memories were his own. He tried to sit up, but was prevented by something heavy and hot on his chest. He breathed in heavily a scent full of ink, sweat, tobacco, and sickness. He looked down and blanched.

Dream of the devil and he shall appear, apparently. Lavi's head lay on his chest, arms wrapped around his torso, and his own arms were holding the other close. The dream still pulsating sickly in his mind, he worked on pushing Lavi over. Then he brushed something and froze again. He squeezed his eyes shut with irritation.

"You spent ten hours feverish, in pain, and screaming," Kanda groaned, "How the hell do you have energy to get morning wood?" Blushing furiously, he peeled the arms off and scrambled out of the bed, staring at Lavi's sleeping form. The other looked like shit. The space under his eye was purple with fatigue, his skin was pale, and his lip was crusty with blood from having bitten it.

"Who are you?" Kanda asked softly, kneeling in the sun that warmed the floorboards of the inn. What are you doing to me?

* * *

><p>And you will get explanations for scars next chapter! Although eyepatch will probably remain ambiguous just because I myself can't wait until the canon reason comes out. And you will probably get a new chapter shortly because I have epic amounts of time sitting around my room waiting for finals.<p>

To all those who review and favorite, thank you so much 3 it warms my heart and makes me squeal like a school girl.


	7. Eye Patch

Sorry for the wait. I wrote a little, got into Spice and Wolf, made ears and am making a tail to cosplay it cuz I have long red hair, watched Elfen Lied, cried in the corner for a while, wrote a Lucky fic in all kinds of bdsm glory that I don't know if I'll post, researched some, wrote some, studied memetics(i.e. read memebase), read some shit, researched some, wrote some, trained once for a maid service, signed up for bartending school, researched some, then wrote the rest. It's a longish one though, so I don't feel too guilty. And it will continue for a while longer, lol. I has new ideas.

Warning 1: Lots of scientific blabble

Warning 2: Don't read the notes until the end. Then they'll help you make more sense of the reason the scientific blabble is there.

Warning 3: Boys burping

Warning 4: Boys kissing

Warning 5: Christmas in the middle of summer! Yay!

And it's probably not as explicative about the scars as you want, but that will come later!

* * *

><p><strong>Eyepatch<strong>

He entered the dining room and immediately wished that he hadn't. It seemed every person in the building was in that room, laughing and singing and wearing Christmas attire. Gritting his teeth, Kanda decided that he would go to the back of the kitchen for his food. He turned on his heel to leave.

"Yuuu!" Oh fuck no, Kanda thought the split second before a force slammed into his back and arms wrapped around his neck. He shuddered when a hot breath hit the back of his ear.

"What do you want, idiot," Kanda growled. He didn't feel like causing a scene and trying to pry Lavi off would do just that.

"Come hang out with us!" the red head pleaded, "It's the day before Christmas!"

"I don't celebrate Christmas," Kanda grumbled. Lavi rubbed his face against Kanda's like some kind of cat. Irritation was seeping through his very core even as something turned in his stomach.

"C'mon Yu, if you want your presents, then you gotta humor us," Lavi giggled. Kanda's eyes widened.

"Presents?" he asked in surprise. Having stayed holed up in his room or gone on missions every Christmas since he joined the Order, he hadn't ever gotten presents.

"Yeah! Lenalee and I got you gifts! Just small things, but I think you'll like them," Lavi said with a big cheesy grin and grabbed his arm, dragging him through the dining room to the table where Lenalee, Komui, and Reever were sitting.

"Kanda-kun! You've decided to join us!" Komui said happily, clapping his arms. Lenalee surreptitiously moved the mug he was about to knock over and smiled at Kanda.

"Hey Kanda, we were going to play Spades(1), but Komui's useless when he drinks," she said happily. Kanda blinked and shrugged.

"Fine," he murmured. Lavi cheered and pushed him to sit down before taking a seat across from him and taking a gulp from a funky smelling mug. Kanda blinked.

"Wait, I have to be his partner?" Kanda asked incredulously. Reever smirked at him.

"It's only fair seeing as how he has an eidetic memory," Reever said, "And Komui won't let him be Lenalee's partner."

"Fine," Kanda murmured as he took up his hand. He was terrible at cards, but he knew Lenalee was just as bad.

They lost their first round, but won every single round afterwards, making their bids exactly and making the others take tricks. Kanda had no idea how they were doing it, but it seemed that Lavi was reading his mind. He certainly knew a few of Lavi's mannerisms, but he was certain that everyone knew them. When he needed Kanda to take a trick, he quirked his eyebrow. When he had a big card, his eye sparkled. When he wanted Kanda to go under, he waved his hand. When he was bidding higher than he thought he could take, he would pull his ear. When he was bidding lower than he thought he could take, he would grimace. Anyone could tell these mannerisms.

Lavi was drinking too, which Kanda thought would start to affect his judgment. However, Lavi could be giggling and frivolous between turns, but would turn super sharp and accurate as soon as he or Kanda touched cards.

"What the hell is with you people!" Reever asked as he took his last trick and lost fifty points. Lenalee was staring.

"Heh, we're awesome," Lavi smiled drunkenly. Kanda shrugged. Reever frowned.

"Hey Johnny, come and be my partner, I wanna see if we can beat them," he said. A group of people had gathered around with mugs of eggnog and were socializing as they watched the game. Some of the other Finders had found a pack of cards and started their own game.

"Hey!" Lenalee complained. Reever smiled sheepishly.

"I just wanna see if another scientist type could beat them, you play really well Lenalee," Reever appeased. She sighed dejectedly and scooted over to sit next to her sleepily drunken brother. Johnny sat down across from Reever.

They didn't lose as badly, but they were unable to crack Kanda and Lavi's winning streak.

"I think you've had too much to drink," Kanda said to Lavi, who was having trouble staying on the seat. Reever started dealing again. Lavi smirked toothily as he caught the cards under his hand.

"I go blind nill," Lavi said with a chuckle. Everyone around him let out a whoop because of Lavi's daring. Kanda raised an eyebrow. He looked at his cards and blanched. What the fuck? The people behind him, staring at his cards, swore under their breaths.

Fifteen minutes later, Kanda left the dining room lugging his partner out over his shoulder.

"I can't believe you held onto that card," Kanda grumbled. After he had covered what he had thought were every one of Lavi's big cards with his royal straight flush of spades, Lavi had slipped in the nine of spades, busting his nill and promptly losing them the hand. Then he had fallen off his chair.

"I though' you dinna care abou' winning," Lavi responded drowsily. Kanda rolled his eyes.

"I didn't get any dinner because of you, ya know," he said not meanly. Lavi hiccupped. Kanda looked down, "You aren't going to puke, are you?"

"Nuh-uh," Lavi said, " 'nd you'll get your fill of food tomorrow. Jerri's been working on dinner all night. It's going to be a banquet."

"I'd rather just have soba," Kanda grumbled as they reached Lavi's door. Lavi wobbled towards his door and opened it before turning to face Kanda.

"I's Christmas Yu," Lavi slurred, "We dunno if we'll get another. Migh' as well spend it happy. O'herwise why bother living?" "Tch," Kanda grimaced. Lavi smirked and laughed under his breath, gesturing upwards. Kanda looked above Lavi's door. A small clump of leaves and berries glowed blue in the moonlight. He furrowed his eyebrows.

"Mistlet-" he was silenced. Lavi had lurched forward and upward and pressed his mouth against Kanda's. Kanda was frozen. The smell of eggnog on Lavi's breath was strong. The red head pulled away and smiled, before wobbling into his room and closing the door.

Kanda stood in the hallway for a while, staring at the closed door. His heart beat like a sparrow's, millions of little skipping beats. Suddenly, the memory of all the alcohol Lavi had ingested sparked an anger in Kanda's face. He bared his teeth in fury.

"A-asshole," he choked out. Lavi was probably like that with everyone. It didn't mean jack shit to that dickface. He stormed to his room and slammed the door shut, falling onto his bed. He stayed awake for a long time, angry.

Just as he was falling asleep, a thought hit him and his eyes snapped open. He needed presents for Lenalee and Lavi. Fuck. He sat upright, completely awake again. That asshole had said they were small. Still, Kanda couldn't not have something for them. He opened his wardrobe and stared. A pile of hair ties lay on the shelf. He picked up two red ones and two black ones.

He quickly rolled the red ribbons into rose shapes and glued them to the black ribbons. Setting them on the wardrobe shelf to dry, he sighed, knowing that Lenalee would be fine with them. He stopped to think of what to do for Lavi. Anger coursed through his veins again. He should give him a new scar.

Shaking his head, Kanda pulled on his coat and headed outside. He didn't have anything in his room for Lavi. Maybe he'd find something outside.

It was snowing and icy cold outside. Kanda's breath left him in a slow foggy stream. Everything about the world was silent, muffled by the snow. The snow crunched beneath his boots as he wandered over to the rabbit hut. He smirked softly as he opened the lid and peered in. The rabbits were all huddled down with each other. He put his hand inside, feeling their heat in this cold environment. His fingers brushed against a shawl. Pulling it slightly, Kanda could see the dirty, yet distinct pattern. It was the shawl that Lavi had been wearing when he first came to the Order. Unbeknownst to him, a smile crawled across his face.

God that kid, he had managed to push every single one of his buttons and Kanda tended to get dangerous when his buttons were pushed. Most people would never come near him again after he lashed out at them. The red head, on the other hand, just kept getting closer. Sometimes too close.

Kanda's expression darkened with anger at how the red head had acted earlier. Fucker. Becoming infuriated, Kanda shut the rabbit hut and stormed into the woods. He should get a fucking stick to beat that asshole. Maybe get him a few rocks and drop them on his head. How about a load of snow in his pants while he slept?

He stormed to his clearing. but paused before entering it. A feather lay amidst the twigs and snows along the tree line. His thoughts vanished and he stepped over to it. It must have been some hawk's feather because it was long and richly designed. He shrugged and picked it up. Lavi would like a quill.

He turned and trod through the snow back to the Tower. He hurried to his room to avoid what sounded like a lot of drunk scientists leaving the cafeteria. Once the door was closed and locked, Kanda trimmed the quill with Mugen. He was still pissed, but common courtesy dictated that he reciprocate gifts. It would tarnish his honor as a swordsman. His anger melted into a dreamless sleep after he crawled into his bed.

The next morning came with the permeating smell of cinnamon, sugar, and meat throughout the entire castle. Kanda had noticed the cafeteria had started a metamorphosis on his way to train. He spent extra time practicing to compensate for how achy his body felt without proper sleep. After bathing, he passed by the cafeteria again and had to stop and stare.

_How the fuck had that happened? _Kanda thought as he stared at the hall. The tables had been shoved together into one enormous table. He wandered in and stared at the decorations. Each place was fully set in an elegant manner. A name card stood at each plate. He slowly made his way down the line, reading each name card to find his. He finally found it near the head. He was seated between Marie and Lavi. Marie was seated by Lenalee, who was seated by Komui, who was the head. Reever sat across from Lenalee, Daisyaa across from Tiedoll, Suman across from Marie, Johnny across from himself, and Tupp across from Lavi.

Kanda narrowed his eyes. The seating had all been chosen purposefully and whoever had chosen had purposefully put him next to the annoying asshole. With a huff, he looked toward the kitchen. It still smelled wonderful. There was no way that Jerri could have done it all.

When he finally headed back to his room, Lavi had finally emerged from his room. Deep bags hung under his eyes and red tufts stuck out in all directions. He looked thoroughly hung over. Kanda felt a twitch of satisfaction at the miserable looking condition, but his satisfaction was short run when a big smile lifted up the tired features.

"Merry Christmas Yuu," he yawned as he stretched, his silky green shirt riding up a bit. He was getting taller, but Kanda still had him beat.

"Don't fucking call me that," Kanda grumbled. Lavi snickered and disappeared into the bathroom. Kanda left to meditate. For some reason, he knew that he would need it.

By the time Lenalee knocked on his door, Kanda felt like he had complete control of himself. However, throughout dinner, he realized that his grasp on control left much to be desired. Between Tiedoll extolling about how wonderful having all of his children present for Christmas was and Lavi alternating between shoving food onto Kanda's plate and his own mouth, Kanda felt himself getting more and more agitated. Johnny was trying to engage Suman in conversation, but the stoic wasn't really reacting. Tupp kept chiming in with various tech lingo that Kanda couldn't understand.

The food was amazing, though. Kanda wouldn't have eaten most of it had Lavi not shoved it on his plate. Cinnamon and nutmeg was present in almost every dish, including the meats. Some had rather powerful spices, though.

"Stop shoving that shit on my plate. I'm not that hungry," Kanda grumbled as Lavi pushed more heavily spiced meat onto his plate, "You eat it."

"I don't like spicy food," Lavi whispered back to him. Kanda blinked and remembered that one of the hostesses kept filling Lavi's plate with all the things that _she_ had created. One glare had kept her away from him. Lavi was apparently too polite.

"Whatever," Kanda grumbled as he picked up the meat with his chopsticks. It did taste good. After what seemed like forever, Komui stood up. Kanda noticed that it was evening already. Dinner had started three hours before, at 4pm.

"Ok everyone, now is the time to exchange gifts if you haven't already, and then we will vacate to let the wonderful church community who so graciously helped Jerri cook to clean up. Merry Christmas to you all!" Komui announced as everybody had finished, "There is a tree in my study and in the lounge to spend time together. I am issuing an order that all exorcists are to report to my study to enjoy the wonderful tree with each other."

Kanda bristled and knew that Komui had done that targeting him and a few other antisocials like Suman. He grumbled and stood up. Oh god, he thought as he leaned forward. Too much food.

Lavi belched as he stood up. Kanda's nose wrinkled as the smell hit his nostril and made his stomach roll.

"Gross," Kanda grumbled and shoved Lavi over. The redhead laughed.

"What, eat too much, Yuu?" Lavi asked, slapping him hard on the back. Kanda felt a gas bubble travel up his throat. He noticed no one was paying attention to them. He narrowed his eyes and smirked, revenge on his mind. Lavi blinked in confusion. That wasn't what he was expecting.

Kanda belched in Lavi's direction. It was a bad one too. He could taste the spicy food on it and the stomach acid. Lavi had been pretty close too, so it was a direct hit.

"UUUUUGGHHHHH!" Lavi groaned loudly, clamping his one hand over his nose and waving the other one to dissipate the smell, "That was fucking gross!"

Kanda smirked triumphantly. Something bubbled warm and fuzzy began to bubble up in a non gaseous way. He couldn't control the chuckle that escaped him and he couldn't stop it. Lavi was laughing too, still traumatized.

"I wasn't fucking expecting that. I couldn't expect that in a million years from you," Lavi laughed, "It was all fucking spicy and acrid and it went in my mouth and burnt my nostrils. Gooooooood, that was terrible, you dick."

Kanda covered his mouth and felt his shoulders shaking. He felt so proud of himself. His eyes started to water, "What the fuck did I say about calling me Yuu?"

"If you did that every time I said it, maybe I'd stop," Lavi cackled, holding his ribs, "That's a worse threat than being chopped up."

Eventually they settled down enough to stop scaring the hostesses, who promptly pushed them out of the cafeteria. Kanda jumped when he realized he'd forgotten the gifts in his room.

"I forgot something in my room," Kanda said suddenly as he turned down the corridor.

"Huh?" Lavi asked, skidding to a stop and pausing, before following after, "You aren't going to go hide in your room, are you?"

"No, idiot," Kanda murmured, "I have orders from Komui." He strode inside his room. He tensed when he noticed the gifts weren't wrapped and slammed the door shut before Lavi could look in.

"Yuuuuuuuu!" Lavi whined from outside the door. Kanda tsked and grabbed some brown paper that had been hanging around his room ever since he had gotten new clothes. He wrapped it quickly and tied it with more hair ribbons. Then he opened the door causing Lavi, who was leaning on it, to fall over. He rolled his eyes and stepped over Lavi to walk towards Komui's study. Lavi jumped up and pulled his door close before darting after him.

"What are those?" Lavi asked as they entered the study. Kanda glanced around the room and opted for the couch in the back where Lenalee was seated, holding two small packages. He sat opposite of her.

"Iooooooooooooo, Saturnalia!" Lavi exclaimed, drawing a few stares.

"What are you talking about?" Lenalee asked. Kanda groaned.

"Why did you ask him?" he asked, but it was too late.

Lavi winked and smirked, "Saturnalia was the Roman holiday celebrating the god Saturn. It took place from December 17th to December 23rd. During this time, many festivals were hosted. Slaves were treated as equals and would often game and gamble with their masters. On the last day, Sigillaria, gifts were exchanged."

"Would you shut up? You're embarrassing yourself," Kanda muttered under his breath. Lavi grinned toothily and took in a deep breath

"'Ioooooooooooooooooo, Saturnalia!

est communis omnium parens

Tanta molis erat Romanam condere gentem

Id est

Ventis secundis

Vir prudens non contra ventum mingit.' Ponce De Leon"

Komui started to giggle at the words being said. Everyone else just stared.

"Translation please?" Marie finally asked. Lavi laughed gently.

"Of course," he said before taking a breath,

"'Hurraaaaah for Saturnalia!

Our fatherland is the common parent of us all

Such a great task was it to found the Roman race

That is

Go with the flow

A wise man does not piss into the wind.'"2

Lavi bowed and was greeted by many hearty guffaws and claps. With a smirk, he plopped down between Kanda and Lenalee, pulling a long skinny package and a tiny package out of his pockets. He handed Kanda the long skinny one and Lenalee the small package, both wrapped in parchment.

"It's not worth very much," Lenalee said as she handed them two small gifts wrapped in thin, decorative paper.

"Expensive gifts are contrary to the tradition of Saturnalia!" Lavi exclaimed, "A gift of low intrinsic value symbolizes a high value of friendship." He smirked.

Kanda opened Lenalee's present first. It was a horse hair tassel. Lavi pulled out a painted bookmark and gave her a hug. Kanda narrowed his eyes when she looked toward him. No hugs.

"Thank you," he murmured and tied it to his belt. Lavi motioned that they should open his next. Lenalee had a bunch of dried lavender tied up that emanated fragrance. She hugged him in thanks. Kanda unwrapped his to find a pair of chopsticks. He thought it was a pretty normal gift surprisingly until he noticed something odd at the end. Upon closer examination, he realized that it was a painted rabbit.

"Rabbits?" Kanda asked as he rapped Lavi on the head. Lavi grinned toothily.

"Your turn!" he exclaimed. Kanda gave them the gifts. Lenalee put her ribbons on and smiled in thanks. Lavi's eyes widened and he grew silent. His fingertips brushed the edge of the feather reverently. Kanda recognized that expression as the same one Lavi gave his rabbits or when he found old tomes. Lavi turned his head to look at Kanda with his good eye.

"Thanks," he said and fingered the feather more. Kanda was intrigued. With just that gift, Lavi seemed to withdraw from his bouncing self. He watched as Lavi's gaze slid over to the large tree in the center of the room.

"You know that the Christmas tree originated from pagan traditions?" Lavi asked, settling back in his seat and getting comfortable, resting both his arms along the back of the couch, "Originally, Germanic and Norse pagans revered trees. They believed life was in the form of a tree called Yggdrasil, which is the tree of life. Many pagans in Germania revered oak trees called Donar Oak or Thor's Oak. There's a famous story about the missionary St. Boniface. He chopped down the Donar oak and when he wasn't struck by lightning, the pagan community lined up to be baptized. I guess they were more open to logic back then."3 Lavi finished with a small sigh.

"What is that supposed to mean exactly?" One of the other exorcists asked loudly, turning in his chair. The entire room went silent. Kanda turned to look at the man. He was an older man with no extraordinary features besides his extraordinary devotion to the Church. Antonio Moretti. Lavi stiffened slightly beside him. Kanda could only tell because of the slight movement of the arm across his back and from the twitch of his ears. The facial expression was that of absolute confidence. Antonio took it as a challenge and stood up, weaving slightly from too much holiday rum.

"Tony, maybe you should sit down," his buddy murmured, "You don't want to make a scene on Christmas."

"It's Christmas. Christ. Mass. It's about God, not some pagans," Antonio grumbled, "And I think its time this kid remembers it. I'm getting sick of these fucking Bookmen and their secrets. We fight with God and give our lives to God. Not these assholes. They sit back and watch. He's observing us right now with his soulless eye of his. That's why I'm going to make a scene," Antonio said, raising his voice and pointing at Lavi, "You just sit back and let other people fight for you. You don't know what loyalty means because as soon as you think its dangerous, you'll fucking leave. You'll watch soldiers and civilians die impartially. Don't insult this organization's religion when you're leeching off of it. Don't be comparing filthy pagan tribes to Christians. You've been here less than a year and you don't know us. You don't even believe what we fight for. And you know what? That's not what pisses me off the worst. It's worse that you leech off us, steal all our secrets to write down for all of history to read and scorn and laugh at and mock, and then you don't fucking tell us anything. _Anything_. All we know is that you're that annoying asshole with the eye patch. And we don't even know what the fucking eye patch is for. Hey, eye patch, what happened to your eye? Why are you so fucking secretive?" Antonio slurred and paused to wait for a reply.

Everyone in the room was shocked and showing it, except for Lavi. The biggest reaction he had was when his eye patch was brought up, with was his muscle in his arm clenched. Sweat started to trickle down the back of his neck.

"Excuse me," Lavi said with an eye roll as he stood up and moved toward the exit. However, with the angle of the room, he had to leave his blind eye in Antonio's direction.

"I was fucking talking to you," Antonio growled as he leapt forward with his hand clenched. Lavi didn't notice in time.

A body hit the floor. Lavi stared at Kanda. Antonio stared at Kanda. Everyone in the room stared at Kanda. Kanda glared at Antonio's supine body laying on the floor.

It had been a neat trick of displacing energy. Kanda preferred to grab people by their throats because they paid attention better when gasping for oxygen, but he wouldn't have been able to stop the fist collision. So he had grabbed the fist, pushed down on it until Antonio's head came down enough for Kanda to put his leg behind it and push enough so that Antonio would flip over backwards and slam into the floor.

"Leave people's pasts to themselves," Kanda growled, "It's not your fucking business. And don't fucking punch people who aren't looking. Surely your God says that somewhere."

He slowly exited the room, past Lavi. He could hear the boy following him until he came to a stop in the far corridor near the exit. The red head stopped a couple meters back. The enormous stone arches let in the sapphire light from the night. Kanda felt exhaustion seep into him with the tranquility that the silence brought. Being with masses of people was hard. He sighed.

"Why did you do that?" Lavi asked finally, in a tired voice. Kanda turned and stared at that green eye He wasn't met with shields, but intense curiosity.

"People don't have the right to pry. Or to punch people in their blind spot," Kanda murmured. Lavi nodded gently and strolled over to lean against the window and stare at the snow.

"Thank you," he said, "I don't like when people probe me about my eye patch and what's underneath it. It's caused me enough trouble."

"Your scars?" Kanda asked tentatively. He expected the boy to tense up, but he just got a tired nod. This was a different side of Lavi and he just poured out exhaustion.

"They're all the same," Lavi murmured, "People. No matter where they go, they pry, they hate, they close their minds, they fear, they revere, they feel, they fight, they get scared, they kill. You get a small town of scared zealots and throw in an anomaly and you get chaos. I was an anomaly with my eye. At first they wanted to drive it out of me with whips and poisons. Then they wanted it for themselves and tried to pull it out. At least that's what Gramps told me, I don't remember it, which is weird, because I remember everything afterward in perfect memory. Every detail. But before Gramps took me as an apprentice, I have nothing, and I was at least five when that happened. All I know is that I can't take off this eye patch. I won't go through it again. I can't talk about what's beneath it. A lot of people ask, too, but I won't tell them," Lavi finished.

Kanda wondered about the fever he had seen and the painful convulsions. He wondered if they were connected to Lavi's lack of memories. He empathized with the desire for information and the pain of old wounds.

"I wasn't born, I was created," Kanda said before he could stop himself. Lavi looked up in surprise. Kanda tried to put a reign on his tongue, but the words just fell out of his mouth in surprising ease, "My body was created within a test tube and my brain was transplanted from an exorcist who had died years before. There was only one other like me. His name was Alma. We were raised in a lab for a short period of time. I tried to kill him at first, but we became friends after being forced through synchronization."

Lavi visibly shuddered. Kanda stepped up next to him to lean against the windowsill. He was dog tired for some reason, "When I began to remember too much from my past life, they tried to kill me. Alma prolonged the wait for a little while by helping me escape, but they found me anyway. It almost worked, but I managed to synchronize with my Innocence. Alma also found a way to synchronize and massacred everyone indiscriminately. He was going to kill me too, but I managed to slice him up enough so his regeneration wouldn't kick in again. I killed him."

Lavi looked up at him with an eye full of feeling. He sighed heavily. Kanda sighed with him. With a wry smile, Lavi shook his head.

"What the fuck is up with this institution?" Lavi asked gently. Kanda shrugged.

"I'm looking for more answers, and until then, I have to keep working for them," Kanda murmured.

"Me too," was the response. Kanda noticed that the red head was playing with the quill. He'd stroke the fibers open, then close them up again. Open. Close. Kanda felt his breath rise and fall to the same rhythm. The air from outside was seeping into the cracks.

"Why'd you leave your shawl in the rabbit hut?" Kanda asked suddenly. Lavi looked up abruptly and blinked in surprise. He smiled softly.

"I guess I just didn't want them to get cold. That thing was getting kind of old and ratty. I'd had it since as long as I can remember," Lavi said as he straightened a little. Snow was falling slowly outside and they both watched it.

Kanda gestured upward. Lavi's gaze followed until it landed on the clump of leaves and white berries. He smirked as he straightened to turn to Kanda. Kanda could sense the nervousness in him as the green eye searched for exits. Good.

"Mistletoe. Did you know that mistletoe is really a parasitic plant that sucks energy out of other plants? It is seen as a symbol of divine male essence, romance, and vitality. In the Prose Edda, there's a story involving mistletoe and how it was used by the god Höðr to kill the god Baldr despite Baldr's mother Frigg making every thing swear an oath not to harm Baldr, except mistletoe because it seemed too young to demand an oath from. In the 3rd century AD..."4

Kanda watched as the red head worked himself up reciting the history of mistletoe. Then he grasped Lavi's chin and leaned down, pressing his lips against the other's, ending the lecture suddenly. Kanda noticed bemusedly that this was the first method that had worked to stop Lavi from talking.

Lavi was limp for a few seconds, hands drifting to vaguely touch Kanda's hands at his chin and waist before he woke up. His eyelashes quivered a few times before fluttering shut. Warm, broad hands came to rest on his chest, his tattoo, and behind his neck. The kiss wasn't obscene and didn't progress past the lips, but it lasted a long time with the two resting against each other in the silence of the azure light of the Christmas moon.

Kanda could feel the energy seeping out of the younger male. He pulled away slowly at the end and brushed a kiss against the eye patch. Lavi's head came to rest on his shoulder. Kanda let his cheek rest in the soft red hair. He stroked the skin of Lavi's hip where the shirt and pants didn't quite meet with his thumb. He felt the butterfly kiss of eyelashes on his neck, then lips on his tattoo.

They finally pulled away from each other with a heavy, beating heart. Lavi smiled softly, "Merry Christmas, Yuu. Good night," before slowly turning and heading back to his room with his hands in his pockets.

Kanda stared until Lavi disappeared before turning, putting his hand over his heart and shuddering deeply. Mistletoe would kill them both.

* * *

><p><em>"I'm sighing.<em>

He closed his mouth.

_Never sigh in earnest._

They were the words of the old woman who had saved him from the flames that devoured the forest, the village, and their homes. She had raised him until the age of five.

_Bite your lips to shreds before you let yourself sigh. Throw your head back at the pain. Never look down. Look forward. And most of all?_

_Never trust anyone. Never open your heart. Remember that. You must engrave these words into your memory in order to survive._

He had been taught over and over. It wasn't that he had forgotten. Each word, each letter was deeply carved into his heart like a mantra, like a curse.

_Sighing creates an opening, a vulnerability. If you want to stay alive, keep your mouth shut. Never let anyone see your weak spot. Let your heart warm to no one. Never trust anyone but yourself._

_You, at least... you at least must survive... you, at least..._

He gripped the handrail.

_Forgive me, gran. I've gone against what you've told me. I've sighed many times for another. I believed him, and opened my heart to him. I placed the shackles around my own feet. But I couldn't have done otherwise. I couldn't cut him away."_

_No.6, Volume 7, Chapter 3 by Asano Atsuko__5_

* * *

><p>Lots of notes because I like talking...<p>

1 Spades is so historically inaccurate, but I don't care

2 I was going to include something from the original document about Saturnalia, but Library of Congress has it in two separate pages for Latin and English with no page or line numbers. So I couldn't. You get Ponce de Leon instead with some great words of advice. Go with the flow and don't piss in the wind. Btw, Saturnalia contains a tradition of removing the shackles from around the statue of Saturn's feet for the celebration.

3 The Christmas tree does not have any distinct origins. It has pieces of origins from all over Germania and Norse mythology because they fucking loved trees. They were like the Lorax. Then there is some Biblical Tree of knowledge stuff. I chose the Donar's oak stuff because I found it funny and ironic and it segued pretty nicely into pissed off exorcists. Modern Christmas trees are a German tradition that spread from churches for kids into nobility and then into everyday houses. Oaks were supposed to symbolize truth, longevity, and loyalty, btw.

4 Mistletoe is an asshole. And there are people in Africa that chew it up until it gets sticky and put it on tree branches to make birds stick to them.

5 If you haven't seen No.6, go watch it online. If you have, but haven't read it yet, go to Nostalgia on 9ths blog or, ya know, read it in Japanese if you can.

And as a side note of bitchiness, I do not think that Lenalee is the smartest of the four. Smart people question and she doesn't fucking question. Unless she's conducting her own research with her brother in robotics or physics or something, she ain't got shit on Lavi. I mean, he's skeptical, has an eidetic memory, and is thirsty for knowledge.

Thank you for reading! And if have the skills and want to be a dear, you can make this story a banner. I'll do anything I can for you in return.


End file.
